


Basic Physics

by tiahwinchester



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bullying, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-22
Updated: 2017-07-27
Packaged: 2018-05-02 16:45:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 32,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5255876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiahwinchester/pseuds/tiahwinchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gavin is kind of a loner, but one day one of the school's most popular, mysterious guys sits next to him and begins to pop up everywhere in his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Assignment

**Author's Note:**

> I STARTED ANOTHER FIC UGH. IT'S ALSO ANOTHER HIGH SHOOL FIC. Every other high school fic i've done has flopped and I'm just like :((( because I love them so much. Hopefully you guys will respond okay to this one! WARNING: THIS FEATURES BULLYING AND NAME CALLING
> 
> Side note: I haven't given up on Secrets, I'm just taking a bit of a break until I find the passion to write it again, I know how it ends it's just every time I try to write it I have to stop after a paragraph because I'm just not feelin it. I also have another really long Grillems fic that has been in the works for months now so, hopefully I can get that out soon!

Gavin didn't have any friends. After he moved from Britain to America, he'd spent his entire high schooling years alone. Now it was his last semester of year 12 and it looked as though he was going to be graduating by himself with mediocre grades. No one even knew he existed. He was just the strange foreign boy. That's why he was so perplexed by the fact that Ryan Haywood just sat himself down about a metre away from him at lunch.

James Ryan Haywood was pretty popular. I mean, being the school's Quarterback has to get you somewhere right? But no one knew very much about him at all. He was very quiet and the only time Gavin had heard him speak was when the teacher called on him in class. Despite being a sporting star, Ryan was also a genius. He was the model student that no one could seem to figure out.

Ryan wasn't with all his "friends" when he sat down at Gavin's table and grabbed a sandwich out from his bag. Gavin stared at him as he ate the sandwich and scrolled through his phone. He opened his mouth to say something but thought better of it. Ryan was big, buff _and_ tall wise, and Gavin wouldn't put it past him to break his arm for saying 'literally' wrong.

Gavin didn't eat for the rest of lunch. The bell rang and he immediately jumped up and quickly walked to his next class. Physics was one of Gavin's favorite classes. He wasn't the best at it but his teacher told him to never stop questioning things, and Gavin was constantly curious. He sat in his usual seat, 3rd row, left most seat. He knew his place, the smart kids sat in the front, the bad kids sat at the back, the kids that listened but still anted to talk sat in the middle column, and the kids that really didn't want to be noticed stuck towards the sides.

"Alright class," began their teacher, "this semester I'm going to be marking you on an experiment." Gavin bit his tongue and repeated _'please not partners'_ over and over in his head. "You'll be working in pairs." He cursed under his breath and searched around the room for _anyone_ that would be even remotely nice or helpful. On one hand, there were mostly nerds in this class, but nerds could also be pretty harsh to anyone that isn't like them. "I'll give you 2 minutes to find a partner, I may split some of you up depending on how much work I know you'll get done."

Gain stared down at his book as the rush of people around him began. He heard someone clear his throat beside him and he looked up to see Ryan Haywood chewing his lip and glancing down at him.

"Everyone else has a partner," he said. Gavin looked around and sure enough, everyone was already standing in pairs and chatting excitedly. He stood up and awkwardly waited next to Ryan for their next instruction.

"Everyone go over to a bench. I'm going to hand out the sheet you will be referring to." They moved to the bench closest to them and when the sheet came around, Ryan immediately turned it towards him. It took him about 30 seconds before he said, "We're learning about mass and acceleration."

"Oh." said Gavin dumbly. Was Ryan going to be one of those partners that didn't let him do _anything_? "Do you mind if I take a look?"

"Oh, yeah sure. Sorry." he apologised politely and joined Gavin on the other side of the bench.

"We're taking it back to the tenth grade. Many of you would have learnt this stuff before," spoke their teacher, "But school is all about learning and _remembering_ , that's why we have tests." some people in the room scoffed, "So, for your assessment, you guys are going to be making up your own experiments to test force and how you can measure it with mass times acceleration." Ryan nodded as if he was already sure of what they were going to do. "Today we'll be doing a practice with the dummy cars. Everyone go and collect your materials and then begin."

"I'll get them." Gavin offered immediately. He felt as though he was going to be completely useless this whole semester when compared to Ryan's brilliant brain. Gavin wasn't particularly strong, he was tall and lanky and although he was pretty agile, he had zero upper body strength. The second he grabbed the large plank of wood they were required to use, he knew he was screwed.

He carried it along with several other items over to the table as best he could, but along the way he knocked one of the girls heads.

"Ouch! Watch where you're going, retard." she spat as she rubbed her scalp.

Gavin muttered an apology and walked faster to their table. Gavin heaved the wood onto the table and went back to the trolley's for the rest of their tools. Ryan set up the experiment while Gavin leaned against the table, moulding a little clay dummy.

"Alright, you ready?" Ryan asked as he reread the hypothesis one last time.

Gavin's job was to stand at the end of the table holding a little piece of wood which acts like a stopper for the car. As Ryan positioned the car exactly in the centre of the wooden ramp, Gavin thought about earlier. Should he ask him why he sat with him today? Would that sound like he was ungrateful for his company? Did Ryan even know he was there?

Gavin was so lost in thought that he didn't notice Ryan releasing the car. He couldn't move his fingers away fast enough and it crashed into his hand with one painful THUMP! He instinctively drew it up to his mouth where he tasted blood.

Ryan noticed and rushed over to his backpack. What he came back with, Gavin hadn't expected. It was a band-aid which he was now unwrapping. He went to grab Gavin's hand and paused, he looked down at him and raised his eyebrows as if asking for his permission. Gavin looked up into his light blue eyes and frowned. Why wasn't he poking fun of Gavin right now? Why wasn't he calling him a 'retard' or an 'idiot'? And why wasn't the class laughing with him like they did at the start of this year when he tripped over a chair? Nonetheless, he held out his hand for Ryan to hold his finger gently. He wrapped the band-aid around his finger in one smooth motion and smiled. Gavin had _never_ seen him smile, but holy shit it was glorious.

"That's better. It's best not to shed blood in a lab." he said and went back to the ramp.

Gavin shook his head. Maybe this semester wasn't going to be as terrible as he'd thought.


	2. Home Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I let one of my friends read the first chapter and he said it was gold star worthy literature, so I wrote more. Btw, contrary to popular belief, I actually love English. Also, James sounds like such an asshole in this but honestly I love that shit, I just needed a mean lil jock that wasn't in AH and I was like bLAINE but then naaaah and then I was like ooooo what about Funhaus, and Bruce was the only sporty one in high school, but he's just too much of a cinnamon roll soooooo...

Gavin was waiting impatiently in English for school to finish. He was never a huge fan of English as a compulsory subject. I mean, what did you even _learn_ in High School English. He understood that with Math and Physics and shit that you were never going to use it unless you became an engineer or something but it still trained and expanded your brain. But learning how to read Shakespeare wouldn't help in any goddamn situation.

He tapped his foot on the ground and chewed his pen as the teacher droned on and on about how Hamlet inspired many modern movies. When he arrived home, his best friend from England, Dan, would be there waiting for him. Gavin hadn't seen him since Christmas 2 years ago. He and Dan were one in the same, except the fact that Dan was handsome, popular, and confident. It was crazy what being pretty and likeable could get you.

2 more minutes and he'd be out of here. "Take a look at The Lion King, see the similarities?" Gavin drew mindlessly in his book to pass the time. He felt the band-aid on his finger and smiled.

The bell rang loud and clear and Gavin hastily shoved all of his things into his bag. He went to his locker to get out the books he needed to read. On the inside of his locker door was one singular photo; it was of himself and Dan covered in paint. Dan was laughing, his arm around Gavin's shoulder, and Gavin was shaking paint out of his hair and staring up at Dan. Gavin remembered that day, they were at Gavin's aunts workshop where she painted, they had been 11 at the time and it was the day that Gavin had told Dan he was going to move to the U.S. with his aunt and uncle. Dan just stared at him for a while before grunting angrily and taking the nearest paintbrush and slapping Gavin with it. Gavin was left with a blue streak across his face, "You don't really think this is my fault do you?!" he yelled in frustration. "Of course it is! You have the _choice_ to move to America! You're _choosing_ to leave me!" Dan shouted. Gavin clenched his jaw before dipping his hand in the yellow paint bucket next to him and flicking it at him. Dan gasped and in retaliation, three a whole palette at Gavin's chest. Gavin was splattered with a rainbow. He splashed as much of the red paint onto Dan as he could. This continued on until Griffon-Gavin's aunt-stormed in. "You boys are cleaning this mess up!" she growled furiously. To Gavin's astonishment, Dan started laughing. "What?! How is this funny? We're going to be here all afternoon now!" Dan shook his head, "I'm gonna miss you, Gav. I'm going to miss times like this." He stood and helped Gavin to his feet. "We'll still see each other," Gavin mumbled. Griffon walked in again with two sponges just as Dan pulled Gavin in for a hug, "You two are the oddest pair, honestly." she sighed as she took out her phone. "Your stench of paint is making me want to retch." Gavin muttered over Dan's shoulder. Dan pulled away and laughed, and that's when Griffon took the photo.

Gavin smiled fondly at the photo. Before he could close his locker, he was suddenly pushed against the one next to it and pinned there by two red polyester covered arms.

"Hey freak." hissed the familiarly dreadful voice of the school's football captain, James Willems. James had had it in for Gavin from day one of middle school, just because he felt threatened by his accent. "My girl was telling me about science class today." Gavin frowned as best he could with his face being shoved into a locker. Was this about Ryan giving him a Band-Aid?

"I-I'm sorry?" He apologized in a whimper.

James scoffed, "You're sorry? She could have gotten brain damage you dickward." he slammed Gavin's face into the locker again as his 'clique' chuckled. Oh, this was about the accident with the plank of wood.

"I didn't mean to okay! I'm really sorry." he whined.

"Sorry doesn't cut it," he growled and pulled Gavin away from the locker only to shove him into his own.

"No no ple-" it was too late. Everything went dark with a loud SLAM. The only source of light were three slits. James and his followers walked away sniggering. Gavin sighed. The people outside were thinning by the minute and still, no one came to his aid. "Hello?" he called out, "Can someone let me out?" After a few minutes, all footsteps ceased and he was alone. He tried pounding the door open but it wouldn't budge.. He reached down into his pocket for his phone to call his uncle, Geoff. _'Call Failed.'_ He really needed to get fucking credit. He leaned his head against the back wall and bit his cheek to stop himself from crying. He was going to graduate along, probably skip prom, and then go forth into the world where making new friends is virtually impossible, that's what school is for. God, he just really wanted to get home and see Dan, he _always_ cheered him up.

Just as he was thinking about showing Dan Taco Bell, he heard footsteps approaching. "Hello?!" he said, "Can you please help me? I'm stuck in my locker." he banged lightly on the door. The light from the 3 slits was suddenly blocked and a deep voice said,

"What''s the code?"

"Uh, 43, 28, 37."

The lock clicked and the door opened. The sudden rush of light made Gavin squint, but when this vision cleared, he looked up to see the wave of Ryan Haywood's soft brown hair. "Thanks" Gavin said shyly.

"How'd you get in there?" Ryan asked as they walked towards the entrance together.

Gavin stared at the ground. It was _Ryan's_ teammates that did this, maybe he'd defend them. "It was just an accident." he murmured. Ryan frowned and tittered.

When they walked out the front, most people had already left, including the bus.

"Ah, bollocks." Gavin cursed, throwing his hands up.

"What? What's wrong? Questioned Ryan at Gavin's annoyed expression.

"The bloody bus has gone. And I can't even call my goddamn uncle to come and pick me up." He sighed. There was a short silence before Ryan shrugged and offered to "Give you a lift." Gavin stared at him. What if this was a trick? What if he was really just planning to drive him to some sketchy area and then leave him there?

"Where abouts do you live?" he asked.

"Southside." said Gavin cautiously.

"I'm going there anyway, c'mon." he jogged down the front steps and into the parking lot. Gavin weighed his options before deciding he basically didn't have any other choice. He followed Ryan, over to a clack and red motorcycle. Of _course_ Ryan drove a motorcycle. He opened the compartment and pulled out two helmets. He tossed one to Gavin and climbed onto the front seat. Gavin turned the helmet over in his hands and thought harder. Was getting home fast to Dan really worth the risk or could he just take the hour walk home. Ryan seemed alright even though the only two personal things he knew about Ryan was that he rode a motorcycle and carried around Band-Aids in his bag. He fit the helmet onto his head and swung his leg around the bike.

"You good?" Ryan asked. Gavin nodded and Ryan put on his own helmet. Gavin felt his seat beginning to vibrate and he clung onto the edges.

Ryan reversed out of the parking lot and zoomed towards Gavin's home. He looked behind him at a stop light to invite Gavin to give him directions. Gavin pointed at streets to turn at. His heart was racing, colours flashed past him, the sun was slowly descending into an orange and pink glow. By the time they reached Gavin's house, the Sun was clinging onto its last minute.

Gavin clambered over the motorcycle and took off his helmet. Ryan grabbed it off of him and opened his visor. "Thank you so much." he said gratefully.

"No problem." his voice was muffled by the visor but he could still be understood. He put the spare helmet into the compartment and turned back to the Brit, "Have a nice night, Gavin." he said.

Gavin swallowed, no one from school had _ever_ said that to him and actually sounded like they'd meant it. He nodded and smiled awkwardly. Ryan shut his visor and revved the engine. Gavin watched him zip away with a heavy sigh.


	3. Worrisome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DAN IS MY CHILD. I LOVE HIM.

"Who was _that_." said a voice beside Gavin.

Gavin quickly turned. A grin spread across his face and he immediately pounced in the person, his arms squeezing their sides. "Dan!" he yelped.

"Hey, Gav." chocked Dan as his stomach was being crushed. "How you doing?"

Gavin pulled away. His heart was beating at a million miles per second and he just couldn't stop smiling from ear to ear. "I missed you." he said finally.

Dan put an arm around his shoulder and lead him in to the house. "How've you been?" he asked once they were inside.

Gavin deflected the question, "You want something to ear or drink?"

"I'm alright, Geoff bought me something at the airport." said Dan as they sat down on the living room couch. Gavin's immediate instinct was to turn on the X-Box, but Dan grabbed his shirt and made him sit back down, "I just wanna talk for a bit." he asked, "How's school?

Gavin shrugged, "It's okay." he really wanted to divert the conversation away from school. Dan worried a lot, although, he never cared for his _own_ safety or feelings.

"Have you made any new friends?"

Gavin laughed lightly, "You sound like my mother." he huffed.

"Who was that guy that dropped you off?"

For the first time since they started talking, Gavin looked at him and perked up a little, "Oh, that's Ryan Haywood. He's just my physics partner." he said.

"So your _physics partner_ , dropped you off at your home," Dan pulled out his phone and checked the time, "half an hour after you were supposed to get here?"

"Yeah, why's that weird?"

Dan raised his eyebrows.

"I missed the bus."

Dan rolled his eyes, "Well, what's been happening? Have you figured out who you're going to prom with?" he asked excitedly.

Gavin traced circles on his thighs. He really didn't want to answer. _Nothing_ had changed since Christmas 2 years ago. Gavin was still a loser, he still had no one to go to prom with, and the only person he'd talked to in months from school he only knew two things about. "I don't know yet. There's loads of choice's, y'know..." he trailed off with a feeble laugh. There was no mistaking the misery in his voice now.

Dan shuffled closer and put a hand on his shoulder, "Gavin, why don't you just _talk_ to someone." he said. 

Gavin's eyes were rapidly filling with tears and he chewed his cheek to stop them from spilling out; it was stupid to cry, he'd been dealing with this for years now. "Nobody likes me, Dan. They all think I'm weird. Besides, it's senior year, everyone already has their friend groups, I don't fit into _any_ of them."

Dan rubbed his shoulder, "Come on, Gav, I _know_ that's not true."

Gavin looked up at him, his eyes glassy, "How? How would you know." his voice hitched.

Dan smiled softly, "Because Ryan just drove you home. Why would he drive you home if he thought you were weird?" Gavin shrugged. " _You_ have to try. You can't spend your life waiting for people to come to you." Gavin looked down at his hands again. Dan didn't understand, it was easy for him to make friends, people _liked_ him. "Give me your phone."

Gavin furrowed his brow, had he heard Dan right? "What?" he said with a sniffle.

"Give me your phone." Dan repeated.

"Why?"

"Because I'm going to help you. You clearly need a push."

Gavin backed away, "What're you going to do?"

" _Help_." Dan said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. When Gavin didn't give it to him, he made a swipe for the phone in his left pocket but Gavin was quick and slapped his hand away. Dan used his whole body to jump on Gavin. In retaliation, Gavin rolled off the couch and attempted to run away but Dan grabbed his leg and he fell. He was smiling as Dan pinned him with his knee. He tried wriggling left and right but Dan was considerably stronger than him and had much more muscle. Dan reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He leant his shoulder and arm on Gavin's stomach as he face away from his face.

"What're you doing?" Gavin asked anxiously. Dan didn't answer. Gavin trusted Dan, but he really wasn't sure how he was going to ' _help_ '. "Dan, what are you going to do?" Whe he didn't answer again, he leaned forwards and reached over Dan to snatch his phone back. His heart almost stopped when he say what Dan had almost done. Dan sat up and tried to get the phone back but Gavin pushed him away and stood. "James Ryan Haywood"s profile was open.

"Just add him, Gav." Dan pleaded.

"Can you just stop interfering with my social life!" yelled Gavin, turning off his phone, "I'm fine okay!"

"No, you're not Gavin." said Dan, keeping a steady tone, "Just add him. It'll be a start, okay? Trust me, you'll feel way better afterwards. You _can't_ live your life alone."

Before anything could happen, Geoff walked in, "Hey boys." he greeted, "Dinners ready, come tell Griffon how much meatloaf you want."

Gavin stormed out without waiting for Dan.

* * *

 Gavin lay on his bed with his laptop in front of him, while Dan showered. He'd cooled down at dinner where Dan announced that he had been accepted into his cities university. Gavin couldn't _not_ feel happy for him.

"That's fantastic, Dan." said Griffon.

"Well done." Geoff congratulated through a mouthful of food.

Gavin smiled at him like a proud parent, "That's awesome, Dan. I'm really proud of you."

Dan laughed, "Thanks papa." he joked.

Gavin was browsing instagram when Dan finally exited the bathroom dressed in his pyjama's. He lied on the end of the bed with his phone held above him. Although in front of him was a photo of the most beautiful orange sunset, Gavin's eye's kept flicking to the other tab he had open. He glanced over his laptop to look at Dan; good, he was intently reading something on his phone. Gavin clicked the tab and 'James Ryan Haywood's Facebook profile loaded up. He clicked on his profile picture. It was of himself and a fluffy Labrador sitting in a tall grassy area. He tried going to the next photo but nothing came up. "Damn." he muttered under his breath.

Dan sat up, "What?" he asked.

Gavin smirked and brought the laptop up closer to him, "Nothing he said smugly.

Dan, obviously intrigued by Gavin's behaviour, crawled up next to him and stole the laptop from his lap. "Oh, so _now_ you take my advice." he shook his head. "Hmm. Well, it seems we won't get anymore information about him until we add him." he raised his eyebrows at Gavin.

Gavin brought his knees up to his chest and chewed his lip. What if Ryan didn't _want_ to be friends? What if he was just being nice? What if Gavin adding him on Facebook made their whole physics subject awkward? But on the other hand, Gavin only had ten friends on Facebook, and it was incredibly depressing having all the posts being his dad talking about politics. "You know what?" he said, "Do it."

Dan smiled and squealed a little before clicking on 'Send Friend Request'. Gavin chewed his thumb nail as he took the laptop back.

"Well, he probably won't respond any time tonight you wanna watch a movie?" Dan suggested.

Gavin nodded, although he knew his thoughts wouldn't be with the movie.


	4. Lunch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm going to be away for a month on holidays :///// but I promise I will write over that time and have a chapter or two ready for when I come back!! I'm so glad you guys are liking this <3
> 
> Side note: It's my birthday tomorrow :D

The next day, Dan drove Gavin into school. "Alright, have fun kiddo." he joked as he ruffled Gavin's hair.

Gavin laughed and attempted to flatten his wild hair. He looked at the front steps of the school and felt his heart sink. He switched back to Dan and sighed. Dan must have been able to rad his face because he pulled the smaller boy in for a hug and said, "Just 6 hours. You can do it." Gavin nodded. He _really_ didn't want to pull away, but sadly it was 8:58 and his home room teacher would probably quite literally _murder_ him if he was late _again_. He said goodbye and slowly made his way up the staircase.

 

* * *

He had math first. Fucking _math_. He tried _so hard_ to understand the goddamn words that came out of his teachers mouth but he just couldn't seem to wrap his brain around how volume and triangles intertwined. He _wanted_ to be good at math, but he just didn't understand and it made him _so frustrated_. It didn't help that his teacher was french and slipped into his first language whilst teaching and never realized. He often left to go to lunch with a giant ass headache. 

He slid his tray along the cafeteria line and grabbed an apple before sitting down at his usual lonely table. But just as he sat down and opened his yogurt, two people joined him, Ryan sat to his right and the school's sporting queen, Lindsay Tuggey, sat in front of him smiling friendly. Gavin looked up at her and smiled shyly. He looked at Ryan who was opening a container of fried rice. He waited in silence for him to say something but nothing ever came. Eventually, Lindsay said, "So you're Gavin right?"

Gavin stopped playing with his muffin and nodded. Lindsay looked at Ryan and then quickly flicked back to Gavin, "I've heard a little about you." she said. Gavin frowned. From who? Ryan? What did he say about him? Was it good? He wouldn't make fun of him or anything would he? Were the two of them sitting with him just to mock him? Either way, he didn't get a chance to say anything because the bell rang. He slung his bag over his shoulder and threw the rest of his food into the bin and stacked his tray atop the rest. He was surprised when he turned around to see Ryan standing behind him. "Uh, hi." Gavin stood there awkwardly and held his backpack strap tighter with two hands, "What's up?" he asked finally.

"Well-we've got physics now so...are you ready to go?" he asked.

Gavin almost chocked on his saliva. He-James Ryan Haywood wanted to walk with _him_ to class. "Uh." he stumbled, "Yeah, sure. Let's-let's go." It was a weird sensation, having someone to walk beside him through the chaos of the halls. No one painfully nudged him in the shoulder. He made it into physics without any bruises. Their teacher had already set up their lab benches with chairs and paper. Ryan and Gavin sat at their usual middle left bench.

Gavin was distracted by getting a pen out of his bag that he was completely caught off guard by Ryan putting on glasses. He couldn't help the sudden splutter that came out of his mouth. 

"What?!" Ryan questioned worriedly as Gavin was staring at him as if his nose was bleeding.

"Y-You're wearing glasses..?" he mumbled.

"Oh," Ryan smiled and pushed them up his nose, "yeah I usually wear contacts but I forgot them today so..."

Gavin giggled to himself as he began to write the date in his book.

"What?" Ryan asked.

Gavin bit his lip as he looked back up at Ryan, "You uh...I just thought that you look like a professor."

Ryan shook his head, "I'll take that as a compliment." When he opened his textbook, all Gavin saw was a mass of black text."

"Whoa, are-are those all your notes?" he asked in awe.

Ryan shrugged and flipped over the page where even more words were written. "Oh, no, they're all my ideas for the assessment." he answered casually. Gavin hadn't even _thought_ of the assignment, he was too caught up in adding Ryan on Facebook. Speaking of which, he'd checked four times this morning and he still hadn't accepted his request.

"So I was thinking, we could do something similar with what Mr..." Gavin listened to him go on about the plan while his mind wandered. Ryan was the only sporty person he knew that had brains, and not just a little brains, but probably the best in the school...

"Hey, Ryan," Gavin must have stopped him mid-sentence because he looked at him unexpectedly, "You're really smart right?"

He smirked, "I have several awards that would suggest so."

Gavin mulled it through his head before saying, "Do you think you could tutor me? I mean, my grades have been dropping gradually since the seventh grade and I've really had no one else to..." he dropped off and cleared his throat. He hated people feeling sorry for him.

Ryan licked his lips and tapped his pen on his book. Gavin became anxious, had he gone too far? His palms started sweating and he was ready to tell him not to worry about it when Ryan said, "Yeah sure, you can come over my place on Saturday."

Gavin let out an inaudible sigh and went back to discussing the assignment.

* * *

 

Gavin  emailed Dan during modern history.

Gavino: Guess what?

Daniel: You finally touched a boob! :D

Gavin rolled his eyes.

Gavino: Ha ha. Ryan's gonna tutor me this Saturday.

Daniel: Oh wow! Awesome! Now maybe you won't be such a disappointment to your family ;)

Gavino: Too far Daniel Gruchy.

Daniel: Aww Im so sorry widdle baby vav

Gavin shook his head and looked up momentarily just to show the teacher he was "listening"

Gavino: Anyway, it's going to be at his house

Daniel: Oh no, Gavin, what if he's actually a mass murderer?!

Gavino: Well you can see me into his home like the concerned father you are.

Daniel: Get back to work, son!

Gavin chuckled lightly and closed his laptop. He wondered what Ryan's house would look like. How many siblings would he have? Gavin had a little brother back home but he'd always wanted a sister. Would he have pets? Ooo, what if he had a cute little kitten!

He was snapped back into reality by the bell going off. He quickly gathered up his things and ran towards the cafeteria. For once in his life, lunch times were his favorite part of school. He rummaged around in his pockets for the $5 he had _somewhere_...he _did_ bring the extra $5 right?

"Shit." he cursed. Maybe he could call Dan or Geoff and tell him to bring him a sandwich? Oh wait, no fucking credit. God, sometimes he could be really dumb.

"What's up?" Ryan appeared beside him and asked.

"I forgot my money for lunch." Gavin sulked as they moved out of the line.

Lindsay approached them, her red hair tied back in a messy bun, "You know that food's really unhealthy for you." she said.

Gavin shrugged, "Well it's all I've got to eat. No one has time in the mornings to make lunches."

Ryan rummaged through his bag and pulled out his wallet. Gavin was ready to protest before Ryan handed him 5 $1 dollar notes. "Make your lunch this afternoon and then refrigerate it overnight." he instructed. Gavin nodded and took the money knowing fairly well that he would _so not_ remember to make his lunch.


	5. Lessons learned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back yooooooooo! I wrote this for ya'll <3 thank you so much for all the kind words! It's truly what keeps me motivated.

Gavin was extremely nervous to go over Ryan's tomorrow. He hadn't been over someone's since year 9 for someone's birthday party he'd accidentally been invited to. He's just gotten home from school and was waiting for a match in Halo to start when Dan walked in with two cans of coke.

"So, what exactly are you doing when you go over Ryan's?" Dan asked as he popped open his coke with a loud fizz.

Gavin shrugged and watched other people slowly join the match. "He's just helping me with my school work and stuff." he said. Dan raised his eyebrows and Gavin frowned at him, "What? He's some sort of super genius or something, and I could _seriously_ use all the help I can get." Gavin was distracted by his phone buzzing and didn't notice Dan rolling his eyes and mouthing "Yeah, okay" sarcastically. "Lindsay?" Gavin questioned as he unlocked his phone.

' _Lindsay Elise Tuggey sent you a friend request_ '

"Who's that?" asked Dan.

"This girl at school...she's friends with Ryan, she sits with him-and me-at lunch."

Dan punched his shoulder lightly and said jokingly, "Aww, Gavvy's go some fwiends."

Gavin didn't laugh this time, instead he cleared his throat and took a sip of coke. Friends were a sensitive subject, even just saying the word made his heart hurt. He'd just been _so lonely_ for _so long_ that even now found it hard to believe that he had friends. Ryan was just his physics partner, and Lindsay-well, he had just _met_ her.

Dan must have sensed his discomfort because he quickly changed the subject, "What does she want?"

Gavin's thumb hovered over the accept button, "She wants to add me on Facebook..." he said.

Dan shuffled closer to look at the phone, "Are you going to add her?"

Gavin weighed the possibilities in his head. Ryan hadn't accepted his friend request yet, maybe it was social suicide to have a _loser_ like Gavin as your friend. But then again, Lindsay _was_ adding _him_.

Before he could make a decision, Dan slipped under his arm and pressed accept. Gavin shot him a frustrated look but still released the breath he was holding. He jumped when his phone buzzed again.

Lindsay Tuggey: Heyy, what's your number? Ryan wants to know. :)

Dan ooo'ed and said, "Ryan wants your _number_." mockingly. Gavin rolled his eyes and texted back, "Hey! It's 1395 362 3684."

A few moments later Lindsay messaged, "Thank you!! I'll see you on Monday :D"

"Oh, _finally_. The match is ready." Dan sighed.

Gavin set aside his phone and coke and grabbed his controller.

Halfway through the match, his phone began vibrating again. Gavin glanced over and saw a number he didn't recognize calling him. His eyes flickered between the TV screen and the phone. The next time he died, he picked it up and answered it, ignoring the annoyed whine of " _C'mon Gavin_." from Dan.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Uh-hi, Gavin?" said a deep voice.

"Yeah."

"Hey, it's Ryan."

The match ended and Dan asked, "Who is it? And it better be good because we lost."

Gavin moved the phone away from his phone and replied, "It's Ryan." He switched back to the phone, "What's up?"

"Have you got a pen and paper or something? I just wanted to give you my address for tomorrow."

Gavin quickly grabbed a sharpie from the coffee table and snatched Dan's arm, "Yeah, go ahead."

"Okay, it's 63 Walkers Avenue."

Dan wiggled and protested a little but Gavin managed to write the address in big, bold, black writing. "Alright, top."

"Just come by around 11." he paused, "If that's good for you."

Gavin mouthed ' _eleven_ ' at Dan and raised his eyebrows. Dan shrugged and nodded. "Yeah that's all good. What should I bring?"

"Uh, just bring your school bag and whatever's in it."

"Okay...well um...I'll see you then." Gavin began murmuring like he always did when he felt awkward or nervous.

However Ryan had the same old unsure yet confident tone when he said, "Well, I'll see you tomorrow."

Gavin cleared his throat, "Yeah, see ya." Ryan hung up and Gavin put his phone down.

"Why couldn't you have written it on your own arm." said Dan as he copied the address into his phone notes.

Gavin shrugged, "Because I don't want ink poisoning."

Dan rolled his eyes and picked up his controller again.

* * *

"Pass me your phone." said Dan to Gavin as they sat in the car in front of their house. Gavin did so and Dan copied the address into maps.

Gavin clung onto his seat belt. They were both 17, which meant Dan had his P plates. Dan was one of those reckless P platers that everyone shakes their head and tuts at. Gavin had never been too interested in getting his license, he didn't see the point, he had access to transport basically wherever he went. Anyway, Gavin made it a habit to tell Geoff and Griffon how much he loved them before he got in a car with Dan driving.

"Ready to go?" Dan asked as he shifted into gear. Gavin nodded and braced himself.

They were on the highway when Dan asked, "Can you check that address again?"

"It's 20 minutes away."

Dan frowned.

"What?" Gavin asked.

"Well, it looks like we're going to the North side." "I thought you said he lived near us?"

It was Gavin's turn to be confused. "When he dropped me off he said he was going this way anyway, so I just took it as he lived around there."

Dan looked like he was trying not to smile as he nodded.

"What?" Gavin questioned again.

Dan laughed lightly, "It's nothing."

Gavin shifted his body to face him now. "What is it" he asked a little more persistently.

Dan opened his mouth, paused, then opened it again, "I just think that he's going through quite a bit of effort for you."

Gavin furrowed his brow, "What do you mean?" he chuckled, "What? You think he's trying to impress me or something?"

Dan raised his eyebrows but kept his eyes on the road. Gavin couldn't see his face but he knew his expression was smug. 

Gavin huffed with a fake amused tone even though he felt a little uncomfortable. It was alright to make the odd "gay joke" with your friends, but Dan's voice made it seem like he wasn't joking at all. It was making Gavin feel extremely awkward at times. He _wasn't_ gay. He liked girls too much. Dan should know that. He's had to listen to six years worth of Gavin talking admirably about this one "goddess" at school. Meg Turney. Dan had never seen her in person before, but he probably had a perfect picture painted in his head from Gavin's detailed descriptions. No, Gavin _wasn't_ gay, he didn't even _think_ of other guys in that way. Sure, he'd had the random dream, but he googled it and the internet told him it was completely normal. Gavin blocked the comment from his mind and sat back in his chair as Dan sped up.

They arrived at Walkers Avenue and strolled down the street looking for #63.

"69,67,65," Gavin murmured under his breath.

"Is this it?" Dan asked as they pulled up in front of a homely looking house.

Gavin squinted at the letterbox, "No, that's 61. Go back a bit." Dan reversed. Gavin looked at the number out the front then up at the tall building behind it. "This...he lives in an apartment?" he said, confused.

"Yeah, come on. I'll walk you in." said Dan as he unbuckled himself and ducked out of the car. He waited for Gain to get out.

 Gavin had just pictured Ryan living in this large but cozy home with hedges and a door mat that welcomed you. He thought he'd be the kind of guy that owned at least two dogs that he'd trained perfectly and greeted guests at the door, but he'd also have a cat that he liked to relax with.

Gavin's thoughts were interrupted by Dan tapping on his window. Gavin grabbed his backpack and climbed out of the car. His bag was extra heavy because on Friday afternoon, he took out every book from his locker in preparation for today.

They walked down the front marble steps to the door. When Dan tried to open it, it wouldn't budge. "Well, now what?" he said.

Gavin asked for his phone so he could text Ryan. Just as he was copying in Ryan's number, the boy in question came skipping down the stairs. He opened the door and greeted Gavin.

"Hey, sorry I forgot to mention you have to press the buzzer." he switched to Dan who's eyes were looking Ryan up and down in a squint.

"Alright, Gav. I'll come round at 3 to pick you up." said Dan, finally turning his attention back to Gavin.

Gavin nodded and smiled nervously, "Yeah, see ya." Dan tapped him on the shoulder and walked back to the car. Gavin turned to Ryan and swallowed. Gavin hadn't been over some's place in years, he couldn't remember how to act, what to say, what was appropriate and what wasn't.

"You coming?" Gavin must have spaced out because Ryan was already halfway up the first set of stairs. Gavin cleared his throat, "Yeah. Sorry." he murmured and followed him up.

Ryan lived on the eighth floor, the highest goddamn level. By the time they reached his front door, Gavin was panting. No wonder Ryan was in such fit shape. The second Ryan opened his front door, Gavin was met with a sudden gush of cool air, it felt like Ryan left the air conditioning on 24/7. Gavin crossed him arms and stepped inside.

Ryan's apartment was really quite nice. There were white shelves filled with ornaments or chinaware, that told Gavin the he definitely didn't have any siblings under the age of 12. There were large glass windows that surrounded the living room and looked out upon the estate. Gavin also noticed something else, the place was quiet, _really_ quiet.

"Wanna sit on the couch or at the dining table?" Ryan asked as he opened cupboards in the kitchen. Gavin sat at the glass dining table and looked around. His furniture looked pretty expensive and his TV was ginormous, so why didn't he live in a house? "Would you like a drink?" Gavin nodded.

Ryan brought over a jug of cold water and two cups. he sat next to Gavin and poured them both a glass. Gavin, feeling incredibly nervous, immediately downed half the glass.

"Alright," said Ryan, "what'd you bring?"

Gavin cleared his throat, "Uh...all of it..."

"Oh...well I guess we'll start with math then."

Gavin unzipped his bag and struggled to take out his math book. When he finally slammed it on the table, Ryan slid it over to himself. The second he opened it his eyes widened. 

Gavin suddenly felt anxious, "W-What? What is it?" he questioned nervously.

"Well it uh..." he paused to put on his glasses, "I didn't know you knew hieroglyphics." he chuckled. 

Gavin felt his face grow hot. He'd never had neat handwriting. When his teacher had tried to teach him cursive his body practically rejected it when his wrist would not stop cramping up. He'd always been super self conscious about it, constantly preferring to type things up. "Sorry." he apologized, his cheeks burning a shade of pink, "I can translate if you'd like." he tried to make it sound as if he was joking and laughing at himself but his voice was too quiet and unmistakably ashamed.

Ryan half-smiled, he could tell Gavin was embarrassed but knew that saying anything about it would worsen the situation, so he huffed and said, "I can make out most of it but uh-what's this?" he pointed to a group of symbols.

Gavin shuffled closer and immediately felt his heart speed up. He could smell Ryan's cologne from here and the faint smell of aftershave. Gavin had never seen Ryan with so much as bum fluff but found himself imagining him with beard scruff. He quickly poured himself some more water and took a rather large gulp. "Um, that's Pythagoras' theorem substituted with the lengths on that triangle."

"Oh...well you've got the lengths around the wrong way," he explained, "here-" he paused, "uh, I don't have a pen." Gavin quickly shuffled through his pencil case for his wooden totem pen that Griffon carved for him as a present, "You can use this." Ryan looked it up and down before smiling and using it to circle the things that should be swapped around.

Ryan chose his words so well that it was like Gavin was learning these things for the first time. That light bulb went off on his mind every time Ryan taught something to him, some problems took longer than others but he always got there in the end. An hour passed and they moved on to English, goddamn _Hamlet_. Ryan helped him translate the sentences into modern English.

Halfway into analyzing the 2nd chapter, they took a break, moving to the couch to watch some TV.

At some point Ryan asked, "So who's that guy that dropped you off?"

"Oh, that's Dan. He's one of my friends from Britain." Gavin felt unreasonably guilty and corrected himself, "My best friend, actually."

"Oh, cool...so is he here for some special reason or just visiting you."

Gavin reached into the bowl of chips Ryan had put between them and took a handful. "Well, he's mainly here for my birthday, but I suppose that's also visiting me."

"Your birthday huh? You didn't tell me that was close." Gavin shrugged, thinking that he and Ryan weren't quite on birthday sharing terms yet. Besides, if Ryan would just freaking add him on Facebook, he would know. He was just contemplating whether he should ask him about it when Ryan further questioned him, "How long is he staying for?"

"About a month. I wanted him to stay till July 4th but he says he's coming back for graduation anyway." Ryan nodded and turned his attention back to the TV.

Hours passed which meant that Gavin had drunk at least 20 glasses of water and found his knee bouncing. They were half an hour into talking about their physics project when he was forced to ask where the bathroom was.

"Third door on the left."

Gavin got up and walked to the hallway as best he could with his bladder about to burst. He counted the doors and opened the third one on the right. He immediately forgot about his urgent situation as he was met with a bedroom. There was an older woman sitting in a wheelchair beside her bed staring at a child's painted hand prints. His face went ghostly white as she slowly turned to him and tilted her head to the side.

Gavin couldn't leave fast enough. She asked in confusion, "Who are you? What are you doing in my room?" her tone was soft but he was still scared out of his mind.

"I-I'm a friend of Ryan's-he's just teaching me some stuff. I'm sorry he didn't tell you." Gavin choked, his hands and forehead sweating.

"Who is Ryan? Where is Doctor Hullum?" she inquired gently again.

"I-I will go get him..." was all he could think of. He quickly shut the door and walked back out into the lounge room. "Thank you so much for helping me today, but it's almost 3 so I should probably head downstairs and wait for Dan." he hurriedly packed away his things.

"Oh, okay. I'll wait with you." Ryan offered.

Gavin slung the heavy bag over his shoulder, "No, it's fine. I can manage." he paced over to the door and stepped outside.

"Well, I'll see you on Monday then." said Ryan.

"Yep." Gavin got to the first step when Ryan called out,

"Hey Gavin, if you ever need any more help, just ask."

Gavin nodded and flashed him a short smile before rushing down the staircase.


	6. Accidents

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the first half of this I was thinking about just cutting it out but then it'd have some continuity errors. I don't even know what happened. This is also a pretty short one because last times was so long. I also have plans for the next chapter and I want it to be a chapter by itself <3

Gavin shuffled up the marble stairs and stood out the front of Ryan's building with his legs crossed tight. _Obviously_ Dan wasn't there yet, it was only 2:45, but god he wishes he could snap his fingers and he would appear. He'd never had to pee this bad in his life. He thought about just peeing in the bushes beside him but they were covered in beautiful, blooming flowers and he just couldn't bare to ruin _another_ thing today. Instead, he sat in the gutter, leaning back on his hands with one leg crossed over the other.

Ryan's words echoed in his mind, "Third door on the _left_ ". He was so mad at himself, he couldn't remember _one_ word. Who was that woman anyway? She didn't seem to know who Ryan was, and she said she wanted some doctor. Gavin felt like he's just intruded on something _very_ private in Ryan's life. Ryan would find out that Gavin had seen her and then he'd get either really embarrassed or angry and not talk to him anymore. To be honest, Gavin felt like he couldn't even look at Ryan at the moment without needing to bring it up. He'd ruined everything.

At 2:57, Dan rolled up beside him. "Hey, Gav, you alright?" he asked cautiously through the window.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Gavin mumbled. He tried to get up but his legs had cramped up and his bladder was practically blasting sirens and screaming at the rest of his body to "HOLD THE FUCK UP!"

Dan got out of the car and crouched down to him. "What's wrong? Did you get hurt?" he questioned as Gavin held his lower stomach.

"Just-help me into the car." Gavin replied in a groan. So Dan pulled Gavin up and let him lean on his shoulder as he limped crosslegged into the passenger seat. Dan started the car and sped off.

"So what's happened? Why are you hurt?!" Dan asked, his face and voice filled with worry.

"I'll be fine once you get us home." For once in his dammed life, Dan was going the speed limit, "Can you _please_ go a little faster!"

"I just don't want to hurt you! Should I take you to a hospital?"

"Oh my God, no Dan! Just-" Gavin felt his bladder lurch. He was sweating all over and his heart was racing, "pull over."

Dan almost didn't catch his words, "What!? Gavin, we're in the middle of a highway I can't-"

Gavin cut him off, "This is happening now. You better pull over or I'm going to ruin your leather seats."

"Gavin, if you don't need to go to the hospital, it can't be-"

"Just bloody do it!" Gavin yelled as he had to squeeze his junk to stop himself.

"God, okay!" Dan pulled over at the next emergency phone and Gavin basically ripped off the car door as he bolted into the trees.

Gavin wasn't exactly discrete. He stood beside an open tree and unbuttoned his jeans. He didn't even stop to think before pulling down both his jeans and boxers. It seemed like hours before his stream finally ended. He felt like he'd just run a marathon and when he climbed back into the car he breathed a deep sigh.

Dan was looking at him, his lips curled together and his smile lines showing. Gavin started laughing, so Dan joined him.

"I thought you'd been stabbed or something!" said Dan in between short breathes.

Gavin shook his head, "Well I'm glad to see you're so graceful under pressure."

They finally calmed down enough for Dan to start the engine. "Did you drink an entire goddamn pool?" he said.

"Close enough. 20 glasses is basically a pond right?"

"You're an absolute tosser, Gavin Free." Dan smiled at him briefly before turning back to the road. Dan's smile was like an image implanted in Gavin's mind, every time he though of him it was always of his smile. It had the powers of a healer, it never failed to make Gabin smile back, no matter how shitty of a situation.

So Gavin smiled back, "Shut up, Daniel Gruchy." he said fondly.

A few moments passed with nothing but the radio to break the silence before Dan asked, "So, what happened at Ryan's?"

Gavin sighed as he remembered, "I blew it. It was going fine, Ryan's actually a really good teacher, but then I found something I probably wasn't supposed to and..." he stopped himself, he was almost going to say 'Now he probably hates me' but did Ryan ever like him? Did he just pity him? Was this all just apart of some big prank? Gavin had lived a good portion of his life alone and anxious and he knew better than to trust the first person who showed him the littlest bit of kindness. Instead, he said "and now I've just ruined it all."

Dan took his hand away from the steering wheels to rub Gavin's shoulder consolingly, "I'm sure it's not as bad as you think. Just sleep on it and I'm sure tomorrow, it won't seem like the worst thing in the world anymore." he said. Gavin nodded and although the gesture was nice and comforting, he really wished Dan would put his hand back on the steering wheel because they were kind of slipping into the left lane.

* * *

That night, Gavin lay back on his bed while Dan put a pillow over his legs and lied on his side facing towards his feet. Gavin pulled his laptop up onto his stomach and opened Facebook. 

He never used to go on Facebook, mainly due to the fact that every time he logged on his feed was severely lacklustre and kind of depressing. But lately he'd found himself obsessed with checking if Ryan had added him yet. But this time, instead of feeling disappointed, he was surprised by a message waiting for him.

Lindsay Tuggey: Hey! Wanna do something tomorrow?

Gavin's stomach jolted. Really? She was inviting _him_ to hang out with _her_. He had no idea how to reply. He'd only met Lindsay four days ago, would it be super awkward? He decided to take a chance, this would be his first 'hang out' in years.

Gavin Free: Yeah sure! What'd you have in mind?

Lindsay was quick to type back, which Gavin was thankful for because his heart was racing at a million miles an hour.

Lindsay Tuggey: Me and my boyfriend were gonna chill at the pool at my place. Wanna join? It'd totally cool if you bring someone as well.

Gavin looked over his laptop at Dan and lifted his leg a little to get his attention. Dan took out an earphone and turned around to face him, "What's up?" he said.

Gavin couldn't help but smile as he asked slowly, "Daniel, would you like to "chill" at the pool with me, Lindsay and her boyfriend tomorrow?"

Dan gasped dramatically and Gavin giggled. "It would be my pleasure, Gavin." he answered.

In a rush of excitement, Gavin whipped his feet out from under Dan and ran into Geoff and Griffon's room.

Griffon was lying with her head on Geoff's shoulder, the remote in hand. They both turned to Gavin when he burst into the room.

"Hey guys," he breathed, his heart catching up, "is it all good if I go swimming with a friend tomorrow at her place?"

Griffon looked up at Geoff who smiled and said, "Sure, Gav."

"Alright, thank you." he was about to run back to his room when he ducked his head back in, "Oh and can Dan come too?"

"Of course. Just make sure you come home for dinner."

Gavin nodded, "Night guys!" he shouted behind him. He jumped onto his bed and crossed his legs, pulling his laptop closer to him.

Gavin Free: Yeah, sure! What time should we come around?

Again, Lindsay waisted no time in typing back, 

Lindsay Tuggey: Anytime after 10 is cool. Just come over to the pool gate and we'll let you in ^_^

A few seconds after, she sent her address and Gavin thanked her along with wishing her a good night.

Dan was staring at him like a proud father and Gavin felt like he'd just won a trophy. He tried to fall asleep at a reasonable time that night but he was too excited. It felt like he was a kid again and his birthday was tomorrow. He couldn't stop squirming.

 


	7. Swims

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's here! This one took a lil longer because I was hanging out with all my friends as soon as I got back to the coast. (Team same desk is my shit Lindsay has been there with him since the beginning okay)  
> btw TW: Mentions of death

Gavin had not been swimming in months, and he didn't mind that at all. Swimming just involved so much _skin_. That was something Gavin preferred to keep to himself, although some would consider his body to be "ideal" with it being slender and tanned, Gavin only saw the flaws. He had no muscle, he wasn't even sporty (except for how oddly fast he could run due to the fact that he was so lean) so the lack of fat didn't do anything for him, he was _way_ too hairy for his age, and his arms and legs were more tanned than his hands and feet. During those rare times that he _did_ go swimming, he made sure to wear board shorts and a swim shirt. Dan however, who was equally as tanned and hairy (but to his advantage much more toned) wore board shorts and flip flops.

"Have a nice time, you two." said Griffon as she sat on the front porch reading.

"Thanks, Griffon. Love you." Gavin said hurriedly. He was very eager to get in the car and go, but now more than ever he appreciated the two people who'd spent the most time with him when no one else would. 

His grin was wide the whole ride to Lindsay's home. He tapped his foot to a nonexistent beat and fixed his hair about 12 times, but even though his nervous habits were showing, excitement triumphed. He gave a little squeal as they pulled into her street. Dan chuckled and slowed down so they could keep an eye out for #24.

Lindsay's home was elevated, it was one of those houses that you had to go up a set of stairs to get to the front door. But as soon as they stepped out of the car, they could hear splashing and laughter. Gavin remembered Lindsay's instructions and they walked up to the side gate.

"What now?" Dan asked as he looked around for a buzzer or something.

Gavin was debating whether to call out or to just go upstairs to the front door when Lindsay appeared from behind the house. She was dripping wet in her towel but nonetheless had a grin on her face.

"Hey there!" she greeted as she unlocked the gate. "Welcome to my humble abode." She turned to Dan and asked, "Who's this?"

Gavin was about to answer when Dan stuck out his hand and introduced himself, "I'm Dan, or the other British guy, if you forget."

Lindsay laughed and stepped aside so they could come in. In her backyard was basically a resort facility. The pool was surrounded by palm trees and even completed by a steaming spa.

Attempting to balance on an inflatable swan, was Michael Jones, the school's resident "bad boy". Gavin hardly ever saw him at school, and when he did, he was waiting outside the guidance counsellor's office, or under the bleachers doing something stupid or dangerous (or both), which was weird because he always got alright grades at the end of the semester. He jumped off the swan and swam over to the edge where everyone was standing. As he pulled himself up and out, Gavin noticed a large mark on his forearm...it looked like-a tattoo? Of...Link? From Legend Of Zelda? Gavin huffed to himself, even Michael Jones himself had a but of nerd in him. He ruffled his curly auburn hair as water dripped from his skin.

"Michael, this is Dan, Dan-Michael." Lindsay introduced as Michael smiled and shook his hand. "And this is-"

"Gavin," he said, much to the Brits surprise, "Yeah I know, I helped un-duck tape your head to a toilet that one time." Gavin flushed in embarrassment but laughed softly just to keep the tone happy. "And plus, I've had to hear your name spoken once every five minutes so it's basically etched into my mind." he murmured more to himself than everyone else, "You can thank-" before he could finish, Lindsay pushed him backwards into the pool.

Michael surfaced with a mischievous smile, "You're so dead, Tuggey." He paddled over to a group of colourful balls and grabbed a few.

"You're gonna have to catch me first." Lindsay stuck out her tongue as she jumped in and quickly swam to the other end of the pool. Lindsay was such a good swimmer and the pool was so long that Michael didn't stand a chance, and yet, he still chased her.

Dan waisted no time in pencil diving into the pool, the cool water sprinkling Gavin's legs. He shook his head like a dog and smiled up at Gavin, "You comin' in?" he asked. Gavin shrugged, he'd kind of planned to sit on the side and dip his legs in. Dan pouted and reached out his hand. Gavin thought about it before rolling his eyes. He grabbed Dan's hand with the intention that he would just crouch down and slip in, but Dan yanked his arm and he fell in on top of him. "Dan!" he squawked and splashed him.

"You're welcome." Dan said smugly before he ducked under the water and dolphin kicked over to the patch of balls. His head bobbed up as he held a ball in the air threateningly, his eyebrow raised at Gavin.

Gavin provoked, "Come at me, Gruchy." But before Dan could throw the ball, and Gavin could dodge, an outsider ball hit Dan in the side of the head. They both turned to where Lindsay was knelt on the swan, her lips curled inwards trying not to laugh, and Michael hovering next to her, throwing a ball into the and catching it. Before any sudden movements were made, Dan said calmly, "Gav, would you join me over here for a sec." So Gavin paddled over to him and they huddled close. "We have to pummel them, alright?" Gavin nodded and smiled wide, excitement bubbling in his stomach. "Ready?" he whispered, "1,2" On his cry of "3" they both picked up ball after ball and threw them in the general direction of Michael and Lindsay. It was hard to tell where they were going because balls were also flying in their direction and Gavin consistently ducked and blinked every time he noticed one coming their way. At one point, Gavin aimed one at Lindsay but she ducked behind the swan's head and spiralled one straight at Gavin's nose. Gavin cursed himself for picking this fight with a goddamn star athlete.

They must've been at it for at least an hour and a half before Lindsay's mom walked out with a tray of meats and several different kinds of salads, as well as fries and soft drink. Gavin got out and towelled his face before walking over to the undercover area and surveying the range of food.

"Don't forget to have some salad as well." said Lindsay's mother as she handed a plate to each of them.

"Thanks Mrs. Tuggey." Dan and Gavin said in union. She left with a sweet smile. Gavin piled on two sausages, a little garden salad, and a load of fries. "Can you bring pour me a drink, Dan?" he asked as his hands were full. He sat in one of the beach chairs by the pool as Dan brought him a sprite and sat next to him. Lindsay sat to his left and Michael took the chair next to her. 

There was silence for a while with nothing but the clinking of knives and forks to break the quiet, until Michael asked Gavin, "What do you plan on doing after school's over?" Gavin racked his brain, truth was, he didn't think about life after school much, he never really thought he'd have any more of a life after school than he did throughout it. He shrugged, "I dunno...probably do something sciencey. I like fiddling with camera's and stuff so maybe I'll do something with that as well." Michael nodded, "Nice, nice. What about you Dan."

Dan almost choked on his coke, he seemed to be taken aback by the question. Gavin raised his eyebrows. Dan wiped his upper lip and answered with a small stutter, "Well-uh-I just got accepted into a pretty good university..."

"Hey, that's awesome!" Lindsay congratulated him, "Yeah, I plan to go to college and probably do like a theatre degree or something. My parents want me to go on a sports scholarship but I dunno...I don't really have a passion for sports."

There was a few moments of quiet before Michael said, "I'm also not sure what I'm gonna do after graduation, thanks for asking guys." Everyone giggled.

Once they were all finished and had sat there for about 20 minutes talking about TV shows they watched as kids, Lindsay jumped up, said she had an idea, collected everyone's plates, and ran inside her house. When she came out again she was carrying something bulky and purple in her hand. "You guys stay where you are. You can do a pose if you want. Michael, do _not_ put up the middle finger." she quickly paced over to the other side of the pool and held a polaroid camera above her at an angle so that everyone could get in. Dan threw up the piece sign while Gavin just tilted his head towards Dan a little. Lindsay snapped the photo with a flash and the picture printed out the bottom. She plucked it out, "Dude, my selfie game is so strong." she said as she jogged back around over to them. All of them stood and crowded around the photo. Michael was holding a thumbs up and with him other hand, looked like he was attempting to hold bunny ears over Lindsay's head but Lindsay's face covered them. 

"That's such a good photo!" Gavin praised as the colour began to set in more and more.

"Do you want it?" Lindsay held it out to him. "You can stick it up on your bedroom wall or something."

Gavin stared at her, "What, really?" she nodded and smiled, "Thank you!" he said as he gratefully took it out of her hands and placed it with his towel. 

"Well, I for one would like to get back into the pool. Anyone up for Marco Polo?" said Michael before jumping back into the pool and splashing all of them. They all agreed on Michael being the first seeker and scattered to various edges of the pool. "Marco!" he called out.

"Polo." they replied. It continued on like this until Michael had basically cornered Gavin and when Gavin slowly pulled himself out, Michael yelled, "Fish out of water!" and Gavin groaned.

Now it was Gavin's turn. From the moment he said "Marco." and three voices replied "Polo." he knew exactly which one belonged to Dan and where he was. He pretended to swim around blindly for a bit before darting quickly to his left and tagging Dan.

"How the hell did you know where I was! I said Polo so quietly." Dan yelped in disbelief. 

"Because I _know_ you and your dumb voice." said Gavin mockingly.

Dan rolled his eyes, "It's not that hard to single out the only British accent."

After Marco Polo, Lindsay whipped out the water guns and they ran around the yard shooting each other, every man for themselves. The sun was setting by the time they finally settled down. Michael and Dan sat in the hot tub chatting about something hilarious while Gavin and Lindsay lied in hammocks staring up at the purpling sky.

"So how did your tutoring session at Ryan's go?" Lindsay asked.

Gavin felt his heart sink once again, he hadn't thought about that since yesterday in the car ride home. "Oh...it was...good." he said slowly.

Lindsay looked over him, an eyebrow raised, "Really? Because Ryan told me you just kind of ran out on him."

Gavin sighed, "I just...I did something that I thought would ruin everything and I panicked. Does he tell you _every_ thing?"

Lindsay laughed softly, "Yeah, pretty much. What'd you do? It couldn't have been that bad, unless you knocked over one of the vases in the hallway? The blue one has his grandmother's ashes in it."

Gavin couldn't help but smile, "No-I...you've been to Ryan's place right?"

"More times than I can count, yes."

"Well, have you been in the third door to the left?"

Lindsay's eyes widening as she came to the realisation, "Ohhhh, you walked in on Ryan's godmother."

Gavin turned to her, "His-his _godmother_?" Lindsay nodded as if this was obvious. "Well doesn't living with your godparents require..." he trailed off.

"Both your parent's being dead?" she finished for him, "Yeah, his father died when he was 11 and his mother passed two years ago." Gavin didn't know what to say, luckily Lindsay continued, "He used to live on my street. We've known each other since we were 3. But when his father was killed in a car collision, his mother couldn't afford to live in the house anymore. So they had to move into an apartment. When his mother died, his godmother moved in to take care of him. But during the past 8 months, she's been very ill-mentally, and she's deteriorating day by day. The doctor says she won't be around for another month. Once she passes, all he'll have is us."

When she finished, Gavin's heart was consumed with sadness. Ryan was always this "cool mysterious guy" at school that everyone wanted to know more about, but it turns out he really _didn't_ want to know his life story. "Oh." was all Gavin could manage.

"Yeah. That's why he doesn't talk much lately. He used to be so loud and funny, in elementary everyone loved him, but then he reached middle school and it all started to go to shit."

"Sounds about right." Gavin huffed. "High school's a bloody bitch." 

Lindsay chuckled, "Amen to that."

Lindsay and Gavin joined Michael and Dan in the spa and about 40 minutes later, Dan got a text from Geoff telling them to get their asses home.

Lindsay hugged both of them and Michael waved them off.

Gavin left with the completed feeling of a successful and fun day. "We should do that again some time." said Dan. Gavin smiled, "I hope we do."


	8. Popularity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: It doesn't outright say it, but it does kind of hint at suicide towards the end. 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy! Keep the comments coming, it's what keeps me motivated <3 any feedback would be wonderful as well!

On Monday morning, Gavin approached the front doors of school with a deep breath. Now that he knew Ryan's story, he felt like he could talk to him instead of feeling overly embarrassed. Which was good, because he had Physics first. Ryan was already waiting at the bench when he walked into class, he was leaning over his book, his elbows on the table either side of his head. Gavin took his place on the other side and began unloading his things from his bag. Ryan smiled gently up at him but didn't say anything. 

Their teacher entered along with the rest of the stragglers and said "You guys can begin. Just come up to me if you need to ask anything."

Finally, Ryan spoke. "Take a look at this, I worked on it Sunday night." He turned his book towards Gavin. Ryan had doodled some pictures of the experiment they discussed the previous week. It was so simple but Gavin would have _never_ thought of it.

"Yeah," Gavin approved, "It's brilliant. Should we get to writing the method then?" Ryan nodded and took his book back. Gavin opened his own book and began writing down a possible method. He supposed that at least some interaction was better than nothing, but he really couldn't tell if Ryan was mad at him or just a little quiet today? Either way they both spent the majority of the lesson writing in their individual books and occasionally asking the other if they should word a step differently.

Lunch was thankfully different though. Gavin and Ryan entered the cafeteria together, and as Gavin went to buy his food so Ryan could save them a table, Ryan stopped him. "What?" Gavin questioned as Ryan reached into his bag.

Ryan shook his head, "I knew you wouldn't make your own lunch," he pulled out a brown paper bag and held it out to Gavin, "so I made an extra one for you."

Gavin's cheeks flushed and he grabbed the bag with a mumble of "Thank you." Michael and Lindsay joined them at their table. Gavin opened the bag and took out what seemed to be a ham and cheese sandwich. He bit into it gladly, for once he wasn't eating semi-edible slightly stale bread. 

"Coach is beating us to death with soccer." said Lindsay, "We're practicing the whole of second break, _and_ after school for an hour and a half. I don't even _like_ soccer all that much."

Michael shrugged, "Just skip it. Two lessons are not going to ruin the whole game."

Lindsay rolled her eyes and patted his head as she said, "Oh, Michael, you really don't understand when I say I _will_ get kicked off of every team if I miss a lesson. The school really pushes sport. I'm surprised it's not compulsory in the twelfth grade."

"I hardly did sport even when it _was_ compulsory." Gavin joined, "I _suck_ at catching and throwing balls. I have _no_ upper body strength. I'd be pretty good at football if I didn't always trip over the ball."

"But-you carry the ball in football?" said Ryan, frowning.

"Oh-sorry, 'soccer'" he corrected himself.

"Well, trust me. Football is _not_ that hard." Ryan huffed, "You should come see us practice next break."

Gavin swallowed down hard, the sandwich in his mouth, "Uh...yeah, okay. I guess I will." he said slowly. Gavin had only ever watched the football team practice from afar as he walked across the oval or had gym. He was way too scared to even go near it let alone sit and _watch_ them play. But he supposed now that Ryan was his-friend-everything would be okay.

Break ended and the next two period's drifted by. He opened his locker and unpacked the books he'd needed for his last classes into his locker. He took out an assortment of carrots and celery complete with ranch dressing to dip them in that Ryan had packed for him. Gavin had blue tacked the Polaroid Lindsay had taken on Sunday next to the photo of himself and Dan. He closed and locked his locker and made his way outside to the ovals. 

He assumed this meant that Ryan wasn't mad at him. He felt a little more reassured when he took a seat in the bleachers and Ryan waved at him. He smiled and waved back, opening up the Tupperware container filled with carrot and celery. Gavin watched them all run up and down the oval, whenever one of them dropped the ball, the coach would make them do 25 push-ups. When he called for a short water break, Ryan pullet off his helmet, ran a hand through his hair, and jogged over to Gavin, grabbing his water bottle along the way. 

He sat next to Gavin, his chest puffing under the pads. "Do you guys always practice in those?" Gavin gestured to the outfit as he held out the container, offering it to Ryan.

Ryan took a carrot and bit half of it off, "Well, coach wants us to get used to the uniforms. So we _usually_ do, but there's the odd exception when we're doing like proper training, like the whole boot camp thing. Right now we're just throwing and catching really." he said.

"You're pretty good. 'Spose you have to be when you're the quarterback." Gavin complemented as he watched some of the other guys lying on the ground trying to catch their breath.

Ryan huffed, "Well there's about 8 other guys on this team that would probably cut off my leg to be quarterback. I've gotta impress coach and keep it up or he'll replace me like _that_." he clicked his fingers. 

"Well, I can tell you, it looks natural on you."

Ryan smiled, and although his face was pink and sweaty, he still looked incredibly handsome. "I try my best." The coach blew his whistle and Ryan stood up. "Well, that's my queue. Are you gonna stay for the rest of practice?" he asked.

Gavin nodded, where else was he going to go really. As Ryan walked back to the group, James approached him, his face threatening. Since he was yelling, Gavin could make just make out the words. 

"Dude, you _can't_ hang around a loser like him. It brings down the reputation of the whole team."

"He's _fine_ , James. He's not going to hurt your precious 'prince' status. Hardly anyone even knows who he is." Gavin was slightly hurt by the last comment.

"Exactly, but if _you're_ seen hanging around him, people are going to start to realize who he is. And then you're going to be the laughing stock, and being our _quarterback_ ," he somewhat growled over 'quarterback', " _your_ reputation effects the rest of us." He jabbed a finger into Ryan's chest, "If you don't get rid of him. I'll convince coach that you're just not fit for the team anymore."

Ryan rolled his eyes and pushed his hand away. James scowled at him once more before grouping up with the rest of the team. Ryan stood there for a few moments, his head tilted towards the sky in frustration, before jogging back over to Gavin and poking his head through the railings of the bleachers. "Hey again." he said.

Gavin's smile was small and sad, he knew what was coming. Typical. He'd finally got a friend and managed to drive him away within a week.

"I was thinking, we have tryouts next Wednesday, you should come." 

Gavin swallowed down the celery he was nervously chewing on and stared at Ryan. "Like...to-to try out?" He said slowly.

Ryan rubbed the back of his neck, "Yeah, I it'd be good-being on the same team."

"I don't know the first thing about football, Ryan." 

"You don't have to. It's just that..." Gavin could take a guess at what he was going to say, but Ryan said it anyway, "I don't like many people, Gavin, but you're different. I just thought that _if_ you were on the football team, more people would notice you..." he trailed off.

Gavin frowned, "I don't _need_ popularity." The bell rang and Gavin closed the Tupperware container. "Well, I have to go to English." He murmured, passing Ryan. He stopped, sighing. He was only trying to help. "I'll think about tryouts. See you tomorrow." Ryan bid him goodbye and Gavin watched him jog back to his team.

* * *

Gavin pushed the rice from his plate of Butter Chicken around with his fork. He tuned out the words Griffon was saying and instead thought about second break's events. Even _if_ he tried out for the football team, that wouldn't automatically make people like him. Sure, people would actually _know_ his name for once, but there was a strong difference between knowing and liking. Besides, he couldn't play sports for ****. He doubted he'd even get past tryouts. The things that Ryan had said kept coming up in his mind, " _it'd be good being on the same team..._ " what'd that even mean? And, " _I don't like many people, Gavin, but you're different..._ " what made him so **** special?

"Thanks for dinner." he said as he grabbed his still half full plate and stood. He placed his dish in the sink and rushed up to his bedroom to grab his phone. Once he'd unplugged his phone he opened his window and crawled out onto the roof. He pulled up his music on his phone and hit shuffle. The beginning of 'What you wanted'by _OneRepublic_ played out loud.

Gavin sat and watched the sun go down over the other houses and he thought about Ryan, practically alone in his little unit, and suddenly he felt guilty.

" _I'll find the places where you hide..._ "

Gavin heard Dan step onto the paneled roof and he turned around just to watch him take a seat next to him. "You alright?" he asked.

Gavin shrugged. Dan nudged him with his shoulder and Gavin huffed. "Ryan asked me to try out for the football team next week." was all he said.

Dan raised his eyebrows, "So? Are you gonna go? Why would you be upset about that?"

Gavin sighed as he said, "Because he thinks I should do it to gain popularity...he knows I'm a loser."

There was a short pause before Dan put an arm around Gavin's shoulders, "If he thought you were a loser, he wouldn't have ever sat at your lunch table." Gavin was about to tell him about what Ryan had said about him being "different" but somehow decided not to. Dan continued, "Maybe he just wants to see you happy. Maybe his idea of you is that all you want is to be recognised."

Gavin looked at his feet, "Well the only person that's recognised me is my biggest god**** bully. But I don't want the whole **** school gawking at me. I'd make a bloody idiot of myself at those tryouts." he began to sob.

"No one's going to force you to do anything, Gav. But I think you should go for it. If Ryan thinks you're capable, then I'm sure you're good enough to make it. Plus, I think you'd make a fantastic Running back." He smiled and Gavin laughed softly.

" _I'll light your fire till my last day..._ "

Gavin looked at Dan, only the street light illuminating his face, and he suddenly felt his heart swell. Dan had always been there for him, he'd always cheered him up or at least tried his best, Dan _never_ gave up on him, when Gavin moved away, Dan had been the one to keep communication when Gavin was ready to give up...Dan was probably the reason he was still here today. Gavin somewhat disliked the term "best friend" because he'd always been jealous of other people that had a lot of friends and could choose a "best" one, but Dan was the ultimate best friend, and Gavin truly couldn't imagine a life without him. He smiled and Dan shook his head, "What?" 

Gavin looked back to the now twinkling sky, "I think I will try out." Dan patted him on the back encouragingly. 

"Awesome. Now can we please go back inside? It's starting to get cold." Dan stood and crouched back into Gavin's bedroom. Before Gavin followed him, he picked up his phone and emailed Ryan "Tryouts are next Wednesday right? After school?" 

Ryan's reply came mere seconds afterwards, "Yeah, at 3:30."

"I think I might do it." He turned his phone off and crawled back into his bedroom.


	9. Practice Makes Perfect

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow over a month later, it's here! I've been working on a bunch of other things so I'm sorry these chapters take so **** long. Comments are always greatly appreciated <3

On the following Monday, Jeremy Dooley, the school's most talented gymnast, joined their table. He sat next to Michael on the other side of Ryan and Gavin. Jeremy was small but still had the outline of strong muscles, perfect for a gymnast. He stole Michael's red bull from him and took a sip before looking to Gavin, "Hey, I'm Jeremy." Gavin was about to say "Yeah, I know." but decided strongly against it. Instead he said, "I'm Gavin." sheepishly. Jeremy looked at Lindsay who smiled and shook her head, staring down at her salad.

"What're you doing this afternoon?" Ryan asked Gavin as he pulled a second lunch bag out of his backpack and gave it to him. Gavin opened it and retrieved a fruit salad. 

He shrugged, it was weird to be asked this. For one, he'd never had someone there to ask him, and secondly, he never did anything. Maybe Griffon and/or Geoff would take him out for dinner or to a movie or some other treat but he was never really _busy_. "Nothing that I know of." he replied.

"Well if you're free, you could come down to the oval after school and I could help you practice for tryouts." Gavin paused before swallowing a small grape and nodding.

"Sure. I'll just message Dan and tell him to pick me up at a later time."

Ryan quickly offered, "I could drive you home. It's no trouble." 

Gavin smiled gently and nodded, accepting. He made to pull out his phone and bring up email but Lindsay questioned, "Have you still not got credit?" Gavin shook his head. She rolled her eyes and gave him her phone instead, "Email takes for _ever_. Just use mine." He typed in Dan's phone number only to see it was already in her contacts-and that they'd had previous messages. Gavin couldn't help but see the last one Dan wrote, " _I mean, it's not like I haven't thought about it before_ " he wanted more than anything to read the rest but decided not to pry. 

" _It's Gavin, Ryan's dropping me home a little later today. Make sure you tell Geoff and Griffon._ " He handed the phone back to Lindsay and continued piercing mango pieces onto his fork.

* * *

Gavin approached Ryan at his locker after school. Lindsay and Michael were also with him, chatting to him about something apparently hilarious. Ryan turned around and gave him a wide smile as he neared. Jeremy appeared behind Gavin, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow." he said goodbye to all of them before walking away with the rest of the crowd. 

"My bus leaves in a minute, I gotta go." Michael said as he kissed Lindsay on her cheek and waved bye to Gavin and Ryan. "Good luck guys!"

After he'd walked out the front doors, Gavin turned back to Lindsay and Ryan, and as if waiting for someone else to say goodbye, he stayed silent.

"Oh, is it alright if Lindsay helps out as well?" Ryan asked. Gavin nodded, he probably _preferred_ it that Lindsay was there. Ryan was great at teaching intellectual stuff, but Gavin was already pretty smart, he just had trouble making sense of it all. But this was sport, and Ryan was intimidating as hell, with his broad shoulders and strong arms, and Gavin felt like he'd look like a small child, attempting any kind of sport next to him. At least Lindsay would be around to laugh with him when he got hit in the head by the ball, he got the feeling Ryan would be the fatherly "It's okay, we'll try again, son" type. 

They made their way through the almost deserted school building and out onto the oval. Gavin put his school bag to the side and stretched his arms up. Ryan took out a football and a stack of cones from his gym bag and jogged around the field placing them. 

"You run much, Gavin?" Lindsay asked while doing lunges next to him.

Gavin laughed sarcastically, "I haven't really _ran_ since bloody year 5." Lindsay curled her lips and mumbled a giggle. "What?" Gavin questioned as she shook her head.

"You're in for a treat today." was all she said.

And she wasn't wrong, as soon as Ryan made his way back to them, he told them they were all going to jog 4 laps as a _warm up_. Ryan was kind enough to run beside Gavin as he practically sprinted his final lap. Gavin leaned over, his harms braced on his knees, heaving, when Ryan said "Hey, you're actually pretty fast when you try." he gently tapped Gavin's back and handed him a water bottle.

"Alright Gav, we're gonna see how good your kicking is." he said.

Gavin perked up and frowned, "But there's basically no kicking involved in football?"

"Trust me, coach is going to want to see how well you kick." They all walked over to the far end of the oval where Ryan placed the football on a small stand. "You see that goal post" he asked Gavin. Gavin nodded, it was kind of hard to miss considering it was directly in front of them. "Try and aim for the middle. I'd go for a run up if I were you."

"Don't suck." Lindsay joked as Gavin backed away a little from the ball. He was _so_ accident prone, this could not end well. And of course, it didn't, he ran up to the ball and made to kick it but his foot got caught in the grass and he fell face forwards instead. He could hear Lindsay howling with laughter as he turned over and groaned.

Ryan leaned over him, "You okay?" he asked concernedly.

Gavin smiled and chuckled softly, "Yeah, I'm fine. Let me try again." Ryan grabbed Gavin's arm and pulled him up. Gavin brushed grass off him and positioned himself once again a little ways away from the ball. He jogged this time, up to the ball, and kicked it. It didn't even reach the bottom of the goal post but he still felt immensely proud. 

Lindsay imitated a crowd and yelled, "And Gavin Free, basically, scores a goal, what a living legend, this will go down in history ladies and gentleman." Gavin shot her a sarcastic look that said thanks-for-being-so-supportive and chuckled.

But he only had mere moments to bask in his success when Ryan said, "Good Job. Now try again." So again, Gavin back away from the ball and came at it with a little faster jog. The ball flew way too left of the post, but it went a lot higher than the first.

It went on like that for at least 40 minutes, before finally, Gavin kicked the ball hard and fast and it zoomed, not quietly directly down the middle, but still _through_ the goal post. He threw his hands in the air and jumped up and down, turning around to Lindsay and Ryan to show his wide smile. Lindsay hugged his side and congratulated him as if he had just won a participation award. Ryan patted his shoulder, "That was really good, Gavin. I think that's enough of kicking, you're pretty much as good as most of the team now."

After they'd had their moment of celebrating, Lindsay let go of Gavin and they both followed Ryan to the center of the oval where Ryan held the ball out for Gavin to take. "So, I know you're a little on the..." he cleared his throat, "light side. But since your fast, you shouldn't _have_ to be tackled by them anyway. Nevertheless, I want you to practice getting past me."

Gavin nodded and Ryan backed away a few inches. Gavin sucked in a deep breath, running into Ryan would probably hurt like a *****, but he went for it anyway. He attempted to dodge to the left of him but his shoulder still struck Ryan's arm and Gavin tumbled sideways. He clung his shoulder and groaned, "Bloody hell, that's going to bruise."

Lindsay, although crying with laughter, rushed to help him up. Gavin brushed off his shirt and although his shoulder was still pretty sore he lined himself up with Ryan again.

Ryan raised his eyebrows, "You sure you're ready again?" Gavin nodded and Ryan laughed softly.

Gavin waited a few moments before charging right at Ryan he did a full 180 around Ryan and successfully dodged him but lost his footing and fell on his back. "Ouch." he choked. When he opened his eyes, Ryan was crouched over him.

"It's about 4 now, I can drop you home if you want?" said Ryan, a hint of pity in his voice, "You're a pretty fast runner, so as long as you show that off to co-"

Gavin cut him off, "I want to keep going." It'd felt _incredible_ to finally kick the ball through the goal, he would give up everything to experience that level of accomplishment again. So Ryan helped him up and they both stood 3 meters away from each other in a stand off. Gavin took a deep breath ran full force before slowing down right before Ryan and skipping to the left. Ryan only just nicked his arm but Gavin was able to keep going. He came to an abrupt stop and smiled, "I actually did it!" He threw his hands up, the ball in one of them, "I dodged Ryan god**** Haywood." he praised himself as Ryan slow clapped, "I am a football lege-" before he could finish, he was suddenly being forced to the ground by a pressure on his side. Lindsay had tackled him.

"That's why you have to run all the way to the end of the field, idiot." she said. Gavin rolled his eyes and grumbled, "Let me have my moment."

They continued on for a lot longer than the kicking, even adding in Lindsay to the mix at one point. Gavin found that he was glad he was so agile as he could now easily bend his body into the oddest shapes to get past them. 

As the sun turned orange, they each stood about 4 paces apart and threw the ball in a circle, just talking.

"...so he made me clean off all the chewing gum under the tables; seriously, how the hell does that have anything to do with me throwing my rubbish into the bin? I made the shot anyway." said Lindsay.

Gavin didn't mean to, it just slipped out, but he yawned, and Ryan noticed. 

"You ready to go home, Gavin?" he asked, catching the ball for the last time and twirling it around in his fingers.

"What? No, I'm fine, just a little puffed out from running and stuff." he said quickly. He wished he could stay in this moment forever, the three of them, just talking, not awkward small talk, but an actual conversation, as friends.

"Well, I have to go home anyway. Dad'll murder me if I'm home after 6 again." said Lindsay with a shiver. "C'mon, I think you're all ready for try-outs" she smiled at Gavin. 

Reluctantly, Gavin slowly made his way over to their bags and hung his over his shoulder. As they made their way to the parking lot, Lindsay told them about the time Michael got caught slipping her an "inappropriate" note and how their teacher usually read out notes to the class, he skimmed over this one and went bright pink before telling him that he had a weeks worth of after school detentions.

Lindsay hugged Gavin as they stood next to her car and Ryan, being so much taller then her, rested his chin on top of her head, her face suffocating in his chest. She pushed him away and punched his shoulder. She bid them goodbye and climbed into the drivers seat. Ryan led Gavin over to his bike, and once again, handed him his extra helmet. Gavin swung his leg over the back seat and scooted up until he was just behind Ryan. As they drove off, Gavin clutched to the edges of the bike. Although tempted to just rest his head on Ryan's back, Gavin instead leaned back on his arms and watched the sky slowly turn pink, and then purple, and then he spotted his first star.

Ryan slowed down in front of his home and stuck his foot out to stop the bike. Gavin awkwardly removed his helmet and handed it to Ryan who put it away into his compartment. Ryan swiftly took off his helmet only to flash Gavin a small smile.

Just as Gavin was about to thank him, Dan approached them from behind. "Hey Gav," he greeted, his hand coming up to rest on Gavin's shoulder. "You must by Ryan?" he said, extending his hand out to Ryan, who leaned his whole back to the right a little so he could shake Dan's hand.

"Yeah, uh, hey, we've met before actually, very briefly, when you dropped Gavin off." said Ryan, a hint of awkwardness in his voice.

Dan nodded to show his recollection and retracted his hand. "Well, _Geoff_ and _Griffon_ ," he turned to Gavin and widened his eyes and for a moment Gavin didn't understand what the gesture meant, but when Dan sighed, "wanted to know if you would like to stay for dinner?" He understood, Dan didn't want Ryan to stay, he probably even argued with Geoff and Griffon. Why though? He'd only just met Ryan, and Gavin had only ever said nice things about him to Dan...didn't he? 

Ryan's jaw tensed and he bit back his lip. He looked away at the slowly darkening sky, then back to the two Brit's, "I better start heading home actually, it's getting kind of late."

Gavin released a breath he didn't know he was holding. He couldn't help but feel a little disappointment, and plus, twice now Ryan had dropped him home, he made his lunches every day, and today he gave up his whole afternoon just to help Gavin, dinner was the least he could do.

"They thought you might say that, so they offered just to pack some of the spaghetti bolognese into a container for you." said Dan.

Ryan, probably deciding that it'd be borderline rude to say no now, got off his bike and rested his helmet on his seat, "Sure, why not."

So Gavin and Dan led him inside, Geoff and Griffon were both in the kitchen plating up the spaghetti. They both looked up when the boys entered and smiled, "Hi!" "Hey, Ryan, right?" they both greeted.

Ryan nodded politely, "Yeah, nice to meet you." it was weird to hear Ryan sound like such a little boy in this moment but for once, Gavin felt like they were on the same level and that Ryan, being so tall and muscular and having such a deep voice, wasn't so **** intimidating. 

"Are you staying for dinner?" Griffon asked as she brought out 3 plates to the dinner table and Geoff brought another 2.

Ryan rubbed the back of his neck, "Actually, I should probably head home now, it's almost," he checked his watch, "6, so..." he trailed off.

"C'mon, we already made a fifth plate for you." said Geoff, placing the last plate in front of the chair next to Gavin who sat in the middle next to Dan.

Ryan was silent for a moment before sighing, "Sure, I guess I can't turn away a fantastic smelling dinner." he pulled out the chair and took a seat.

As they ate, Geoff asked, "So have you lived in Austin your whole life?"

"Yeah-well, actually, I was born in Georgia but when I was about 3 years old I moved here." Ryan answered. One of his hands rested in his lap and the other held the fork that curled the strings.

"Any siblings?" Griffon added.

"Not that I know of." he chuckled gently, everyone but Dan laughed moderately.

"How're you going with school? Have you got anything planned for afterwards?" Geoff questioned.

"Geoff, please, _I_ don't even have any plans." said Gavin before Ryan could answer, "leave the poor boy alone."

Geoff looked at Gavin and raised his eyebrows, "Yes, but I expect that from you." Gavin smiled cheekily. 

Ryan answered anyway, "Well I've actually been offered a sports scholarship to UT."

Gavin felt a little dumb now, both Ryan and Dan had been accepted into University and Gavin was still to decide what he wanted to do with his life.

"That's fantastic." Griffon praised. 

"Yeah, I'm very fortunate."

Gavin mumbled, "I mean, you're super smart too so it's not all fortune..." intending for only him to hear it, but Ryan must have because he looked down at Gavin and gave and genuinely thankful smile as if that's all he'd ever wanted to hear.

"What do you parents do?"

Gavin almost choked on a meatball at Geoff's question. Ryan's fork stopped spinning and he cleared his throat, "Um-my parents are-they passed away..."

An uncomfortable silence filled the air and Gavin wanted to shrink into the ground or apologize to Ryan or kick Geoff in the shin, just anything to get his heart beating normally again.

"Oh, that's terrible, I'm so sorry. Who do you live with?" said Griffon, thinking that this would clear the tension. Gavin put his fork down and rested his head in his hands, now they're gonna talk about the even _more_ depressing story of his godmother.

"My godmother." Gavin was kind of thankful that's all he said, and both Geoff and Griffon knew not to continue on with anything about his family.

"Are you coming to Gavin's birthday party?" asked Geoff. Gavin sat up straight now, he hadn't asked Ryan about the party at all, mostly because the only time he'd brought up his nearing birthday was at a time when he wasn't quite sure yet if they were friends or not.

"When is it?"

For once, Dan spoke, "Two Saturdays from now." he smiled at Gavin.

"If he wants me there, I'll go."

All eyes turned to Gavin. "Yeah, I mean, it won't be anything big, probably...but you can come if you want." he murmured, Gavin never really had birthday parties. He'd had plenty when he was little, but once he moved, and he threw that one fateful 13th birthday party and no one came, he hadn't had a single one since. His birthday's mostly just consisted of Geoff and Griffon treating him to a fun day. One year, they bought him tickets to go back to England for two weeks, other times, they bought England to him, like this year with Dan. But since he'd been hanging out with new people recently, Geoff and Griffon convinced him to let them throw him one.

"Awesome," said Griffon, "I'll print you out an invitation tomorrow."

They finished their dinner and Ryan thanked both Griffon and Geoff before awkwardly shaking hands with Dan and following Gavin out to his motorbike. "Thanks again for today." said Gavin as Ryan climbed onto his bike.

"You're gonna kill it tomorrow, I promise. This'll be great for you." Ryan smiled before it was covered by the helmet.

"See you." 

Ryan waved as he accelerated away.


	10. Tryouts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was such a hard chapter to write, I knew next to nothing about American football and so I read the entire wikipedia article on it to do this. I also didn't want to ramble on too much about the whole tryouts but there were still parts that I had to include but for me it just sounded like it was dragging on and on. God damn...when it gets to his first game I'm literally just going to be like "Wow and he ran to the end real fast and scored a goal, gold star Gavin." Also, James sounds like a real dick in this story but I love him v much I swear I just needed a stereotypical "Jock Jerk".

"Good luck today!" Dan shouted out the window as Gavin walked from his car into school. He turned and waved before taking a deep breath and skipping up the front steps.

Today was tryouts, during second period, chemistry, Gavin couldn't stop fidgeting. In a few minutes, it'd be lunch time and he and Ryan would walk down the halls to the ovals and there was no doubt in his mind that he was going to do something to mess it all up, embarrass himself, humiliate Ryan for ever even considering him for the team.

"Just breath, okay? It's not going to be the end of your life if you don't make the team." said Ryan as Gavin struggled to tie a piece of string around a hook on the account of his shaky hands. 

Gavin gave up and sunk his head into his hands, "It's not just about whether I make the team or not, it's that _everyone's_ going to be watching me and the chances of me tripping or getting hit in the face are pretty high." he sobbed. Ryan smiled and somehow made Gavin's heart slow down if only for a second before it faded into a look of reassurance.

"Gavin, _trust_ me," he leaned down across the table so he was eye level with Gavin, "I wouldn't have said anything at all if I didn't think you could do it. Besides, during James' first game, when he was running to catch the ball, he crashed into the cheerleaders and the water table."

Gavin giggled, suddenly James wasn't all that intimidating anymore. The comforting feeling from Ryan's words was quickly washed away as the bell rang throughout the school. Gavin closed his eyes in breathed out.

Ryan packed away his bag and rubbed Gavin's back, "C'mon, we'll meet Lindsay and everyone at the stands." Gavin shakily stood up straight and zipped up his bag before following closely behind Ryan. Gavin stuffed his bag into his locker and they both made their way to the ovals. At one point, James walked out of the bathroom and as he spotted Gavin he made to say some insult but spotted Ryan and begrudgingly retracted the words. This gave Gavin a new sense of confidence and he stepped onto the green grass fields with a much more positive outlook.

Sitting in the bleachers was Lindsay, Michael and Jeremy, and as they approached they stood and stepped down to meet them. Lindsay immediately pulled Gavin in for a hug, "Don't fuckup." she said in his ear with a laugh.

Michael and Jeremy also said some words of encouragement and Gavin thanked them, but when he heard the couch blow his whistle, everything was wiped from his mind. Ryan had to basically push him to jog over to the gathering of about 26 boys around the couch. Gavin certainly felt the loss when Ryan had to leave his side to join the coach. 

"Alright, I'm coach Burns, this is the team captain Ryan Haywood," he pointed with his thumb to Ryan, who stood with his arms crossed beside him. Today we're gonna go through a series of obstacles to see where you're at, starting with a short sprint. I'm gonna put you into pairs, you'll both be racing against each other." after informing everyone, he moved through the mass of people and put them each into mini groups of two. When he got to Gavin, he sucked in a sharp breath. Without even taking a second glance at him, the coach pointed to a very handsome boy who probably went to the gym 6 days a week. Gavin sighed, there was no fucking way he was winning against this guy.

"Hey, I'm Blaine." he greeted with a charming smile as he held out his hand. Gavin shook it weakly and stared at the ground to hide the sweat gathering quickly on his forehead and under his eyes. 

"Gavin." he mumbled faintly.

Coach Burns finished up with the others and ordered them from 1st to 5th. The 1st competitors took their spot on the track and sprinted about 40 yards ahead before they reach a line of cones and came to a halt. Gavin and Blaine were 4th, and as 2nd and 3rd took their turns, his heartbeat steadily grew. 

"Alright, Free and Gibson," shouted coach who searched his list for their names. "Take your mark."

Gavin rubbed his sweaty palms on his pants and breathed roughly through his nose. They took their places next to each other and waited in anticipation for the coaches whistle. The 30 seconds of waiting felt like 2 years of Gavin's life had gone by already, but then the shrill sound of the whistle rang

and he willed his legs to move. Blaine was fit, really fit, and running looked so natural on him, but somehow Gavin was faster even though he looked like a flailing mess, and he reached the finish line seconds before Blaine did. He almost fell face forward because he'd been running so fast and came to such an abrupt stop, but he caught himself at the last millisecond. He smiled wide as a loud "Yeah, Gavin!" came from Michael in the stands. Coach Burns called up the last team and after instructed everyone to form a line.

"Now we're gonna do some drills. I'll sort you into three groups judging by how you performed in the speed assessment and just your general structure." he said, "Don't get offended boys." There were a few snickers down the line. "If I name you a linebacker, guard, or tackle, go with Kovic," he nodded to a boy standing next to James who smiled and waved. Gavin had seen him hang around with James, but he definitely had a much better attitude than him. "If I name you a running back, centre, quarterback or wide receiver, go with Haywood." Ryan ran a hand through his hair and smiled friendly. "And this year we're also looking for kickers," Gavin looked at Ryan who raised his eyebrows as if to say ' _told you so_ ', "so if I name you a kicker, go with Risinger over there." a boy with long dark hair tied back in a man bun smiled meekly. "Alright," he began on the left hand side, "Linebacker, Linebacker, Wide Receiver, Centre," one by one they shuffled off to crowd around the players they were assigned to, "Linebacker, Tackle." One Hispanic boy muttered, ' _Goddamnit_.' under his breath as Coach said "Kicker." he continued on, "Guard, Linebacker, Wide Receiver," he paused at Gavin for a moment before snatching a quick glance at his list of names and said, "Running Back." Gavin let go of the breath he was holding and moved off to join Ryan. Coach finished up with the rest of the boys and blew his whistle, indicating that tryouts were beginning.

"Guys, follow me." said Ryan, and the group of about 5 boys jogged with him to a corner of the field. "We'll just do a few stretches to get warmed up." he bent his knee into a lunge and everyone followed. Gavin looked around at one of the groups who were doing fast knee kicks and the other group who were already running laps around the oval. Once they were finished stretching Ryan told them how they were going to run in lines passing the ball to each other. Gavin was not nearly coordinated enough for this activity and for the first few runs, he dropped the ball every time it got to him. Two of the boys look at each other and shook their heads, one muttering something under their breath while the other laughed. Gavin dropped his head as he jogged to pick up the ball he'd fumbled once again. "Try again Free, don't think about it too much." said Ryan, giving him an encouraging nod. Gavin breathed heavily through his nose and joined the line, he passed to his left and continued running.

The next activity involved one person waiting with the ball in the centre until Ryan blew his whistle, then they'd snap the ball from under them to the person behind who'd either pass to someone to the side or Gavin, who was behind him; he nearly always passed to the guy off to the side. Eventually, after Ryan told him he had to pass to Gavin next turn, Gavin got his moment, he caught the ball and ran full speed ahead to the "goal line" he touched down the ball and his smile spread from ear to ear. Ryan flashed him a gently smile before blowing his whistle and moving them on to the next activity.

Finally, after two more activities, coach called them all over to the centre where he'd laid out an obstacle course for them. They were to weave in and out of the cones, carefully run through the tires, then catch the ball and run it down to the end goal whilst dodging James and Kovic. The first person began running and the rest joined one after the other. Gavin's turn was rapidly approaching and it took everything in him not to just pass out then and there. In the corner of his eye he could see Ryan next to coach biting his thumb and watching him anxiously. Finally, the boy in front of him went and about 10 seconds later, he followed. He got through the cones quite easily but when it came to the tires, he had to slow down quiet a bit so as not to trip himself up. With a great sense of victory, he stepped over the last tire and caught the ball thrown at him. All he had to do was dodge James and Kovic and it'd all be over, he run as fast as he could with the intent to pull back at the last millisecond and run around them. But as he made to veer to the left, James' shoulder clocked Gavin in the face and he fell backwards.

Gavin's ears were ringing but even through his blurred vision, he could see James smirking above him. Something swelled up inside him, and somehow he got to his feet and balled his fist before swinging back and punching James in the jaw. It didn't do as much damage as what James' shoulder did to him, but he still felt immense satisfaction. James shoved him backwards. Gavin went to kick him but the ankle he stood on gave out and he fell with a painful twist. Coach Burns stepped between them and pushed James aside. He kneeled down next to Gavin and gave him a rag of sorts which he thrust into Gavin's hand and forced it up to his nose. He then poked Gavin's ankle ever so slightly at which Gavin whined and tears pricked the corners of his eyes.

"Ah, crap, he's gonna have to go to the Nurse's office." he said, "Haywood, can you take him?" he looked over at Ryan who was already kneeling on Gavin's other side.

He nodded and asked Gavin, "Can you walk-or hop?" The fire he'd felt before when he'd punched James had fizzled away and now he was just weak and tired and sore, but still, he attempted to pull himself up on one hand but inevitably crumpled back down. He shook his head and whimpered, "I'm sorry."

"No, it's gonna be all good. I'll just-I'll carry you." and so Ryan wrapped one arm around Gavin's shoulders and the other he tucked under his knee's as he got to his feet. There were a few snickers from the other boys as Ryan carried Gavin Bridal-Style across the field. Lindsay, Michael and Jeremy rushed towards them as they approached the school building.

"You alright Gav?" Michael asked.

"What James did was completely uncalled for." said Jeremy.

"I would like nothing more than to punch the crap out of that pretty little face of his." Lindsay grumbled, "Did it feel good."

It hurt a little to speak due to his probably broken nose, but he chuckled lightly and sighed, "Words can't even describe how bloody incredible it felt."

They made it to the nurse's office and Ryan placed him onto one of the beds where he gathered some ice in a plastic bag wrapped in paper towel and sat on the bed with Gavin's leg resting on a pillow in his lap and held the ice on his ankle. The school's nurse came in to inspect the damage. First was his nose, the rag had thankfully seemed to stop the bleeding, but it there were still twangs of pain as she carefully prodded the bridge.

"Looks like it's just bruised, it'll probably take up to about 2 weeks to heal. Just make sure you put a cold wash cloth or ice twice a day for around 15 minutes to make sure it doesn't swell up, and you should only have to do that for about 4 days." she informed him. Then she moved down to the ankle. Gavin yelped once again as she lifted his leg slightly upwards to inspect it properly.he gripped the plastic bedding tightly as her fingers moved around the already swollen ankle. "Yeah, without an x-ray I'd say it's sprained. I'll put a bandage on that one." She moved across the room to the cupboards and pulled out a roll of bandages. As she wrapped it somewhat tightly around his foot, she explained further, "Make sure you change this every day. Go down to the pharmacy ASAP to get some crutches. It should only take about 3 weeks to heal, if the swelling doesn't begin to shrink, go see a doctor." 

Gavin nodded, he felt that if he opened his mouth all that'd come out was a high pitched scream. "Who should I call to come get you?" she asked. Thankfully, Ryan answered for him, "Geoff Ramsey, he'll probably be his main contact." She moved off into a separate room just as the bell rang. Everyone seemed determined to stay with Gavin, put the nurse poked her head around the corner and motioned with her hand at Lindsay, Michael and Jeremy, to move off to class. So with rolls of their eyes and sympathy smiles at Gavin, they shuffled out the door. Ryan stayed, putting the ice back onto his ankle. 

"You did good today." he said.

Gavin scoffed and swallowed before speaking, "Sure, because ending up in the first aid room indicates that I totally made the team."

"Trust me, you're on the team."

Gavin rolled his eyes, "I made an idiot out of myself today, and it was all for nothing."

"I'm not joking Gavin, Coach likes someone who plays in a team but also shows independence, and you did that today. You kept going even though you messed up, and hey, you showed that even though you got a shoulder to the face, you'll still get back up and keep going. You're _going_ to be on that team Gavin." He said.

Gavin felt his heart warm, he did do all that today. He smiled even though it hurt, but it was worth it to see Ryan smile back.


	11. Detention

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I reeeaaaalllllllyy wanted to add in the whole thing how Gavin and Dan always call each other B, but since I haven't used it yet, I'm not just going to suddenly add it in, but I did seriously consider it for a while

"I can't believe Principle Sorola gave you both detentions for yesterday." said Lindsay to Gavin and Ryan at lunch on Thursday. "I mean, _after school_ detentions? For _three_ days?! Just for defending yourself!" she shook her head.

"You didn't even do anything, Ryan." Michael joined.

Ryan chuckled sarcastically, "Yeah well, according to James I forcibly shoved him for no reason."

"I'm really sorry Ryan," Gavin whined, he did feel really guilty about involving Ryan.

"Gavin, trust me," said Jeremy, "I think we can _all_ forgive you, everyone's wanted to punch James for years."

"Why does he hate me so much anyway?" Gavin asked, but Jeremy just shrugged. He'd wanted to know that ever since he'd moved here, it seemed that since his very first day James had had it out for him. He made especially sure to make his life hell, sure, he was a dick to others but it seemed like he really did not like Gavin, but Gavin had been nothing but nice to him this whole time...well, up until yesterday that is.

"How's your ankle doing?" questioned Ryan as he handed Gavin his lunch.

Gavin scoffed and rolled his eyes, "The bloody crutches are too big for my arms so I look like a chicken when I'm walking."

Jeremy laughed, "I gotta see that."

Gavin opened up the tupperware container containing a chicken salad and he admired the effort Ryan would have gone through to cut the chicken pieces into the perfect squares they were in. At first, Gavin felt bad for eating the lunches Ryan had prepared for him, but after about a little over a week it was normal, and instead of it being a reminder of Gavin's stupidity, it was like a gift from Ryan every day.

"How long are you on crutches for?" Lindsay asked

Gavin shrugged, "I dunno, the nurse said 3 weeks but the ladies at the pharmacy said a month. I'm probably just going to end up throwing them away as soon as I can at least limp on my own."

"And your nose?" Michael gestured to the bridge on his own nose and Gavin was suddenly reminded of how sore it still was.

"Hurts like an arse." he huffed. He forked down the salad while Lindsay talked about her Modern History assignment before moving on to a rather small apple.

As Lindsay spoke to anyone who would listen rather than one particular person, Ryan leaned in closer to Gavin. "Meet you at your locker this afternoon?"

Gavin smiled and nodded, "Can't wait." he said through a bite of apple sarcastically.

The bell rang and everyone moved to pack away their things. Gavin bit down on the apple to hold it in his mouth while he stuffed the brown lunch bag into his backpack. As he fumbled for his crutches, he jumped when suddenly an unfamiliar hand tapped his shoulder. He turned around to see none other than the goddess herself, Meg Turney. Gavin's breath caught in his throat and he began choking, the apple stuck in his mouth doing nothing to help. He pulled it out along with a string of spit which he quickly wiped away from his chin. He tried to say "Hi." but all that came out was a soft whine.

Meg just giggled, and Gavin was convinced that that would be the noise the angels would play as he died. "Hey there," she greeted, "I saw you at tryouts for the football team, you did really well." she said.

Gavin really tried to answer, but his mouth had so dry that the only thing that could be heard was the wet slapping of his tongue. Lindsay nudged him in the ribs and Gavin came to his senses. He looked at the ground instead of at Meg and answered, "Uh-thanks." he could feel his cheeks burning but he hoped desperately that his face was still the same olive tone.

"I'm pretty sure you made the team." she smiled as she moved a strand of bright purple hair behind her ear.

"Yeah, haha, I hope so." he chuckled feebly.

There was a pause as she pulled out a pen from her jeans and bent down to reach into her bag and pulled out one of her books. She tore off half a page and began scribbling something down. "So, I'm having a party on Saturday. It's just at my place. You should come."

Gavin froze. Was she actually inviting _him_ to a _party_? _Her_ party? He just could not believe what he had just heard, and yet here she was, the girl he'd been crushing on for years but ultimately thought he never had a chance with, standing in front of him, holding out a piece of paper that contained both her address and phone number.

When Gavin failed to give her anything but stutters, Lindsay took the paper from her and answered, "He'd love to."

"Awesome, well it's at 8. You can text me if you have any questions or anything." she said cheerfully, she was about to turn away and walk off with her friends when she quickly swiveled around and said, "Oh, sorry, I'm Meg by the way." Gavin just nodded. "See you 'round, Gavin."

Gavin couldn't remember introducing himself, had she known his name the whole time? Before he could dwell on it anymore, Ryan placed a hand on his back and tapped him forward.

"Come on, Gavin, we've got Physics."

* * *

Ryan met Gavin at his locker and they made their way to Gavin's English classroom where detention was to be held. Already in there was James and three other younger kids Gavin didn't know. James scowled at him and Ryan as they walked in. They sat down in two chairs as the teacher looked up from his desk.

"Don't get comfortable. You're not staying here." he said as he stood, picking up a sheet of paper from his desk. "Burton." he called out, "You'll be cleaning the bathroom mirrors." "Free," Gavin perked up, "You'll be cleaning graffiti off the toilet walls." He sighed and sunk back down into his chair. He read out two other kids names and their punishments and then Ryan's, "You'll be joining free cleaning graffiti." The only person left now was James, who would be scraping chewing gum off of the desks. The teacher told them where they were going and warned them all that he'd be making his way around to all of them to check up.

Gavin and Ryan shuffled off to their assigned restroom. The janitor gave them both a bucket, some bleach, a sponge, gloves, and a rag. Gavin took one cubical, placing his crutches outside the door and sitting on the toilet seat, and Ryan entered the one next to it. As they scrubbed away at the walls Ryan asked, "So, you're all good with our Physics assignment at the moment?"

Gavin nodded, mostly because that was his way of saying "Sure." which really meant "I don't have a goddamn clue but I really don't want you to think I'm dumb because I really haven't contributed anything to this assessment." But then he remembered that Ryan couldn't see him, so he was forced to say, "Yeah, I get most of it. There's just a few things I'm confused about."

"Well what are you confused about? I'll try to explain it better." he offered.

Gavin furrowed his brow, he struggled to make intelligible words but just ended up dribbling a confused sentence of "I just-the whole thi-like how the hypo-I just don't get-like the distance and how-" he sighed in frustration, "I dunno, just all of it...I have no idea what I'm doing."

He couldn't see Ryan but he was sure that if he was in front of him right now, he'd put a hand on his shoulder and look down at him with a sympathetic smile. "You could have told me from the beginning that you didn't get it and I would have gone into as much detail as I could to help. How about you come over my place after school on Friday and I'll go through it with you?" he offered.

Gavin didn't realise when he'd stopped scrubbing, but he collected some bleach onto his sponge and started scratching away at the pen covered walls. "I'll ask Geoff and Griffon when I get home but as of right now, sure, that'd be great." Although the last time he went over Ryan's place didn't exactly end the best, Ryan was actually a really good teacher. 

About 15 minutes past before Gavin's mind began to wonder. One of the writings on the wall said "Add me on Snapchat - tiahbabe100 <3" which got him thinking of his Facebook. It'd been over 3 weeks since Gavin had sent that friend request to Ryan and he _still_ hadn't accepted it. He considered him and Ryan to be friends. He didn't want it to sound like it bothered him, but it really did, "Uh-Ryan..."

"Hm?" was the boys response.

"I was just wondering, just now-I was just curious, not that it's all that important or anything I was just thinking about it and stuff-" he murmured

Ryan chuckled softly, "What is it, Gavin?"

"Um-well, I just want to know the um...the reason you hadn't added me on Facebook yet..?" as the sentence went on his words became quieter.

"Sorry, I didn't catch that?" asked Ryan, his loud scrubbing had stopped.

Gavin also stopped and instead fiddled with his gloves, "I added you on Facebook a while ago but you-um-haven't added me back yet?" it sounded so stupid and childish and he was so goddamn glad that Ryan couldn't see him because his face and neck were burning.

"Oh-" Ryan said, "Sorry." seconds that felt like hours to Gavin passed before he continued, "I don't really go on Facebook much..." he then mumbled "anymore" under his breath, probably more to himself but Gavin still caught it and it made his heart sink.

That was not the answer he'd expected...Now his throat was dry and he'd never felt more embarrassed. "It's not like-" he tried to start but his voice was too hoarse. "I get it." was all he could get out in a sigh. They stayed in an uncomfortable silence until the teacher came in another 15 minutes later and told them they could go home.

Gavin was so glad that he'd arranged for Dan to pick him up afterwards because the ride him with Ryan would have been awkward as hell. Dan was waiting in his car, his arms crossed in the drivers seat. He felt obliged to say goodbye to Ryan so he paused at the bottom of the steps and turned to face him. "So I'll uh-I'll see you tomorrow." he said, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Yeah...make sure you ask your parents if you can come over." Ryan was looking in some far off place over Gavin's head as he spoke.

Gavin felt the need to correct him, "Oh, they're not my parents-but yeah, I will." a few awkward seconds passed before a loud honk startled them both. Gavin spun around to shoot an annoyed squint at Dan who shouted "C'mon!" out the window. "Sorry...see you." he said, finally look at Ryan in the face. The sun was just behind his head and it made the the edges of his blonde hair look even more softer than usual.

"Yeah," Gavin was about to turn away before Ryan quickly added, "Listen, I'm sorry if you're upset about me not adding you or anything. I haven't been on Facebook for a while now...but I'll accept it when I get home if you really want me to."

Gavin felt so goddamn stupid for sounding so childish that he actually chuckled, "Trust me, it's not that important. I rarely go on Facebook either, I just wanted to know why is all."

"Oh, well, it wasn't anything against you." he smiled, slinging his bag further up his shoulder.

"Gavin, seriously, hurry the bloody hell up!" Dan called out.

Gavin glared at him once again and yelled back, "I'm coming, calm down." before muttering under his breath, "christ..."

"I'll see you tomorrow then." said Ryan.

Gavin smiled, "Yeah, see you." And just as Gavin gathered his crutches and went to hop away, he could have sworn he saw Ryan's arms twitch as if to hug him. His cheeks pinked as he shoved his crutches into the back seat and climbed into the front.

"How was it?" Dan asked.

"Hm? Oh, excellent, I had the time of my life." he said sarcastically as he buckled himself in.

Dan started the car and soon he was zooming out of the parking lot, "What'd you have to do?"

"Just scrub off graffiti. The school's literally riddled with it. And I'll bet anything that there'll be more on those walls tomorrow anyway." he scoffed.

"What were you guys talking about back there?" he questioned.

Gavin shrugged, "Nothing really." Dan raised his eyebrows at Gavin who at that very moment didn't particularly want anymore injured bones due to Dan not looking at the friggin' road so he quickly said, "Just about the whole Facebook thing, but it's fine, it was nothing really."

"Okay, okay." Dan dropped the subject, "You wanna do something this weekend?" 

Gavin remembered the party and he perked up, shifting in his seat to directly face Dan. "I've already got plans for us. You know Meg right? Meg _Turney_?" he said eagerly.

"Of coouuurse, I've only heard about her tan skin and milky brown eyes about 18,000 times a week." Dan said mockingly.

Gavin ignored him, "Well, guess what happened!"

Dan shook his head, "I dunno, she accidentally bumped your shoulder while walking down the hall."

"No, she invited me to a party!" he paused so Dan could digest it, but Dan just laughed.

"You're having a laugh?" Gavin bit his lip and shook his head. Dan looked from him to the road repeatedly and Gavin marvelled in the way his eyes lit up at the realisation. "That's fantastic, Gav!"

Gavin giggled, "She just tapped me on the back and asked me! And she already knew my name!"

Dan slapped his shoulder encouragingly, "That's really incredible, Gav. Good for you."

Gavin smiled fondly, "Thanks Dan. So you'll come with me, yeah?" he asked.

"Of course you nutter." said Dan. 

They spent the rest of the drive with Dan tapping along to the beat of the drums on the steering wheel and Gavin holding on for dear life on the sides of his seat.

When they arrived home, dinner was ready and waiting for them so they sat in the lounge room with Geoff and Griffon and watched a movie. During a rather boring part, Gavin decided to spring the question, "Hey, Geoff."

"Hm?" Geoff hummed.

"I've been invited to a party on the weekend, can Dan and I go?" he tried his very best to hide his smile and sound casual, but when Geoff turned to Griffon in astonishment, he couldn't contain his small laugh.

"What time and where?" asked Griffon.

"Just at this girl, Meg's place at 8 on Saturday..." he crossed his fingers under the blanket wrapped around him.

A few moments past where Griffon and Geoff seemed to be having a conversation through various looks before Geoff said, "Fine, but no drinking and driving. I'm serious, your driving's already bad enough Daniel."

Dan just laughed and high-fived Gavin.

The memory of earlier today struck Gavin's thoughts and he added, "Oh, and can I also go over Ryan's Friday afternoon so we can work on our assignment."

"Wow, aren't you just Mr. Popular now." Geoff joked. Gavin laughed and looked to Dan, who was no longer rejoicing in their previous victory but instead staring at the TV in front of them, a blank expression on his face. Gavin frowned for a moment before Griffon answered, "Yeah, of course you can." and he relaxed.

At that moment his phone buzzed and he sneakily edged his phone out of his pocket to find a nice surprise, 

' _James Ryan Haywood accepted your friend request_ '

He unlocked his phone to view his profile. His profile was still the same picture of him and his dog, but now that Gavin got a closer look at it, it was definitely from a few years ago, and when he looked at the date, his thoughts were confirmed. _14 November 2014_. He switched to the next photo in line, a picture of Ryan out the front of Disney land. The next photo was a selfie taken by Lindsay of them both dressed in Medieval clothes. The next picture was of Ryan and Lindsay at considerably young ages sitting on an inflatable swan in Lindsay's pool, both wearing sunglasses and throwing up peace signs. Gavin smiled softly and exited the photo's to scroll down his timeline, his smile faded instantly.

The very first post on his timeline said, " _My biggest condolences to you Ryan. Your mother was truly a lovely woman. If you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm here_."

He kept scrolling, " _I'm so sorry to hear about your loss Ryan. Praying for you, love you lots <3 xx_"

" _She was taken too soon, my thoughts are with you Rye._ "

" _Stay strong Ryan! ox_ "

It just went on and on. None of them had been liked or commented on which gave Gavin the impression that Ryan hadn't seen them at all, probably avoiding it all. Now guilt overcame Gavin like icy water being poured over his head, That's why Ryan was never on Facebook. And now he'd made him open it up just because he was a whiny little bitch that couldn't deal with one person not adding him back. He quickly shut off his phone and cursed at himself under his breath. He probably just opened wounds Ryan had been working on stitching up for years. He really didn't have the heart to even look at Ryan tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NICE FUCKIN SNAPCHAT SELF PROMO ME


	12. Study Group

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A whole month later and here it is, enjoy <3

Gavin hadn't seen Ryan Friday morning, thankfully. But as he sat in English, he anxiously chewed the end of his pen and tapped his foot on the ground as the clock slowly ticked down that minutes till lunch. He still felt immensely guilty for basically asking Ryan to relive all the crap he first went through two years ago. But his fate was inevitable, and the bell rang shrill in his ears mere moments later. He breathed in deep as he gathered his pencil case and books and made his way to his locker. He wasn't paying much attention to anyone around him until someone called out, "Hey, Gavin!" he swivelled around to see Ashley Jenkins standing with Meg at her locker. Meg's hand was over her mouth as she giggled, looking from Gavin to Ashley. "See you tomorrow." Ashley winked at him and Meg pushed her playfully and giggled still more. It seemed they didn't even require an answer because Ashley looked away from him to talk with Meg.

So, he turned back around and continued on his way, this time his cheeks a little more flushed. As he packed his things into his backpack ever so slowly, yet another female voice said from behind him, "Aw, that's cute."

Gavin turned his head to see red hair in his peripheral, it was only Lindsay. She reached around his head to touch the polaroid she'd taken that day at her pool.   
"Anyway," she retracted her arm, "we're going to the library to study, you wanna come?" she asked.

Gavin finished packing his stuff away and closed his locker, spinning around to face her. "Yeah, sure." he said, maybe in the library he won't feel so obliged to talk to Ryan. Lindsay led the way while Gavin followed closely to her left, "Oh, wait, I forgot." As they continued walking, Lindsay twisted her bag around to her front and dug out a brown paper bag. She zipped up her bag and placed back on her shoulders. "I stopped by Ryan's this morning and he gave me this to give to you." she said.

Gavin took the bag and looked inside, it was his lunch. "Ryans-not here?" he questioned.

Lindsay shook her head, "Nope, he's not feeling too great today." Gavin noticed that the tone of her voice sounded like she'd said this many time before.

Gavin didn't know whether to feel relieved or even worse. On the one hand, this was another day he'd avoided facing him. But on the other side of it, Ryan felt the need to stay _home_ because of it. Or maybe he was actually sick, but Gavin still felt an immense pain of guilt hit him. Anyhow, they reached the library and waiting for them at a table was Michael, Jeremy, and a kid he'd seen around but never actually knew the name of. Gavin took a seat between Lindsay and Jeremy.

"This is Trevor, by the way." Lindsay introduced as the boy smiled and small wrinkles echoed around his mouth.

"Hi." he said. Gavin just smiled lightly and nodded in recognition. 

They started off with English before they got bored and moved into groups to study their individual subjects. Jeremy was in Gavin's Modern History class so they teamed up to quiz each other.

"When did the French Revolution begin?" Jeremy asked.

"1789."

"What's another name for the Guillotine?"

"The National Razor."

"Who was Napoleon?"

"I don't know, the dude who fixed France?"

Jeremy laughed, "Not sure if the teacher will accept that but it's close enough for me." "Alright, my turn."

Gavin cleared his throat, "Which President "ended" the Vietnam War?"

"Nixon."

"First Name?"

Jeremy rolled his eyes, "Richard."

"What was different about the Vietnam War?"

"It was televised and shit."

"What year was JFK assassinated?"

"Are you and that Dan guy together?"

Gavin paused, "Wha-I-don-why wou-No? How is that relevant?" he choked out.

"So there's _nothing_ between you both?" Lindsay said this time, and Gavin turned around to see that the other three were looking at him now.

"No. He's just my friend? We've been friends since we were kids." he answered defensively.

"You guys seem _super_ friendly though." Michael added.

Gavin squinted at him, "Yeah, because he's my _friend_."

Lindsay switched back around to mumble something along the lines of, "Those looks you give each other would suggest differently."

Gavin wanted to yell, scream, cry, _anything_ just to let out every feeling that was mixing around in his chest. Instead, he pushed out his chair abruptly, grabbed his crutches, and hopped away quickly to the bathroom. He slammed and locked the door of a cubical and sat on the toilet lid.

Did _everyone_ think he was gay? What the hell was it about him that made everyone have the preconceived notion of "gay"? He was sick of it. Why did being friendly with your best _friend_ automatically mean gay? It wasn't like they were holding hands, braiding each others hair, and hugging every five seconds like _girl_ best friends do.

Without realising it, a tear had rolled down Gavin's cheek. And it was in this moment that all he wanted was for Dan to be by his side so Gavin could rest his head in his lap and cry it out.

He immediately shook that thought from his mind, thinking like that would only add fuel to the fire. He wiped the tear away and stood, grabbing his crutched and unlocking the door.

He hadn't heard anyone come in, but standing in front of one of the mirror's, washing his hands, was Bruce Greene, one of James' friends.

Gavin swallowed. Bruce looked up at him in the mirror before turning to face him. Gavin opened his mouth to say "sorry" or "please don't hurt me." but nothing came out. Instead, Bruce spoke first.

"Hey," he said slowly, "listen, I just wanted to say sorry for everything that James has done to you..." Gavin's jaw dropped slightly. "I know it may not seem like it, but he never _actually_ means any of the things he says to you. They're all just empty words to him." he continued.

Gavin furrowed his brow and found his voice, "I'm not sure if that's any better." he scoffed.

"Yeah, well, he only does it to make you seem less than him."

"If he wanted to made me look like an absolute tosser, then mission accomplished." he rolled his eyes.

"He was-well, always has been-afraid that you'll steal his 'popularity' or whatever. He needs a lot of attention or he'll just shut down, hide away."

Gavin repeated it over in his head, "James is...afraid of- _me_?" he questioned.

"Partly, yeah. He's just worried is all. But sometimes he takes it too far, and I'm sorry for that." Bruce finished, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

Gavin huffed. James had bullied him, degraded him, basically ruined his _life_ , all because he was scared that he was going to "steal" a few members of his circle? He shook his head, "Thanks." was all he could think of to say. They were spared the uncomfortable silence by the bell ringing. Gavin remembered his things were till sitting in the library. He rushed past Bruce, uttering a small "See you." But when he reached his library, his things weren't there. He let out a deep frustrated sigh and hopped a little faster to his locker. Sitting in front of his locker were his books, pencil case, and lunch bag. One of them must have brought it back for him. A twinge of guilt struck his heart as he packed the things back into his locker.

* * *

Gavin didn't talk to Jeremy in Modern History, nor to that new kid in Film. He stayed in the classroom during the next break and he packed his things into his locker at the end of school alone. He couldn't wait to just get home and play Halo with Dan.

But as he hopped down the last step and looked up into the parking lot, he saw Ryan waiting, leaning on his bike. His heart suddenly sped up. He _really_ did not want to face Ryan right now. Ryan waved at him and Gavin felt the sick feeling creep further up his throat, now he definitely couldn't just get on the bus and pretend he hadn't seen him. He sucked in a short breath and made his way across the lot. "Hey." he said in a rather shaky voice.

Ryan greeted him with his usual smirk, "Hey, you didn't think I'd forgotten you did you?" he reached behind him and handed Gavin his usual helmet. As they mounted the bike, Ryan said "Sorry I wasn't there today, I hope everything didn't all go to shit?" he chuckled.

Gavin laughed feebly. Ryan swivelled half his body around to face him and furrowed his brows, "Are you alright?" he asked.

Gavin softly shook his head, why was _he_ moping? It should be Ryan who seemed upset, but he was surprisingly cheerful... "Yeah, I'm all good," he answered, this time with an actual smile, "Just a little tired from today I guess."

"Well we shouldn't be too long." With one smooth motion of a hand through his hair, he slid on his helmet and revved up the bike.

There was one thing Gavin noticed was different when he rode on Ryan's motorbike; the lack of music. If there was ever a tense moment in the car with Dan, or even Geoff and/or Griffon, one of them would just turn up the radio and that would be their way of distracting themselves. But as they zipped through the streets, Gavin was forced to be along with him thoughts.

Ryan didn't seem upset? Or was he just putting on that fake persona that Gavin had done numerous times with his family. He just couldn't tell if the tension ran both ways right now. Ryan was a cool guy, and he was a pretty great friend, but Gavin just didn't know him as well as he knew Dan, so he couldn't read him as easy. Gavin knew that if Dan was putting his hands in his pockets too much, then something was up. But he didn't know Ryan's nervous traits and mannerisms yet. What he did know now was that he wanted to find out. He wanted to be the guy that knew everything about the mysterious kid.

He must have been lost in thought for a while because before he knew it, they were slowing down and entering the shared garage of Ryan's apartment. Gavin leant on his crutches as he swung his bandaged foot over the side. Gavin was reminded of the stair leading up to his flat he he sighed deeply. He tried to make it up the first set of stairs on his own but five minutes later, he was already sweating and out of breath.

Ryan huffed and shook his head, "Here." he took his crutches from him and let him wrap his arm around his neck as he supported him up the stairs. At one point, through heavy breaths, Gavin joked "What, you're not gonna carry me bridal-style this time?"

Ryan laughed, "You gotta get your exercise in somehow."

Once they reached the Eighth floor, Ryan opened the door and handed Gavin back his crutches. Inside, Gavin immediately heard the music of Elvis Presley playing somewhere in the apartment. Ryan didn't say anything about it, so Gavin didn't ask any questions.

"You can sit on the couch if you want, it'll probably be more comfortable for you." said Ryan. So Gavin sat on the couch, leaning his crutches on the arm, as Ryan disappeared into the kitchen. He arrived back with two cans of Diet Coke and a bowl of carrots and guacamole. "Alright," he began, "I'll talk you through the assignment, you just stop me at any point that you don't understand."

Gavin nodded and listened to him go through all the steps, occasionally interjecting to ask _why_ they were doing that. Only 15 minutes later and Gavin was feeling more confident in his physics assignment than any of his others, he'd even contributed with a few ideas.

"So is there anything else you need help with?" Ryan asked.

Although their last tutoring session had ended catastrophically in Gavin's eyes, he had learned a lot from Ryan, there was really nothing else that could be taught, it was more just fixing his mentality now. But as he looked at the grandfather clock behind Ryan, he saw that it was only 3:40 and he longed to stay there for hours and hours more. Anxiously, he shook his head, "Not really."

Ryan chewed his lip before saying, "You wanna watch something? We have Netflix."

Gavin released a breath he didn't know he'd been holding, "Sure, what're you thinking of?"

"Have you seen Jessica Jones?"

Gavin shook his head, "I've heard it's good though."

"Yeah, I've been meaning to watch it. That cool with you?"

Gavin nodded and sat back more comfortably on the couch.

A bowl of pistachios and a full episode later, Gavin asked, "So, why weren't you at school today?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah, I woke up with a really bad headache. Knew I wouldn't be able to concentrate in any of my classes." he said as he fidgeted with an empty can of Diet Coke in his hands. "Did I miss much?"

Gavin thought back to the argument in the library. It seemed so petty now. He just shook his head. "Nah, not really."

A few minutes later, Ryan's phone charmed. He read it before looking to Gavin. "Lindsay and I are going down to the night markets tomorrow for dinner, did you wanna join?" he offered.

Gavin was about to rush to say yes, but something in his head told him to stop and think about it for a second. That's when he remembered Meg's invitation. "Oh, well, I was actually planning to go to that party so...you should come though." he answered sheepishly.

"I'm all good." said Ryan, rejecting the invitation with a wave of his hand.

Gavin sat up as best he could, "C'mon, you're the one that keeps pushing me to actually _do_ stuff. Maybe you should take a page out of your own book."

"Parties aren't really my thing..." he murmured.

Gavin slapped his foot, " _Football_ isn't really my thing." he raised his eyebrows and snatched up the remote to pause the TV so he couldn't look at it as a distraction. Ryan stared at him and sighed.

He finally rolled his eyes and muttered, "Fine." Gavin threw his hands up in celebration. "Just don't expect me to stay that long." he couldn't help but smile at Gavin's triumphant expression.

Gavin's rejoicing was cut off by a soft voice calling out, "Ryan?"

Ryan's face fell, but without looking to Gavin, he rounded the couch and disappeared in the hall. Gavin noticed the music had stopped. He felt extremely uncomfortable just sitting there, but he didn't want to just leave abruptly again.

But then the soft music began playing again, " _Dream, Dream, Dream, Dream_..." and he relaxed. 

"Gavin?" he heard Ryan call out, "You wanna come he a second?"

Gavin gathered his crutches and swallowed. He wasn't scared, just nervous. He hopped into the room he'd run out of just a few weeks prior. Ryan was putting a record back into its sleeve and Ryan's godmother was in her wheelchair by a small window. Ryan nodded for him to come closer, so Gavin approached the both of them.

"Sherry," said Ryan as he crouched down beside her chair. The old woman tilted her head to face him, "this is Gavin." he reached up his hand to touch Gavin's arm.

She looked up at him and furrowed her brow, "Your brother?" she questioned.

Ryan shook his head, "No, I don't have a brother. He's my friend."

She smiled ever so slightly and nodded in recognition before turning back to the window. Ryan stood up straight, "That's Sherry, she's my godmother." he said to Gavin.

Gavin thought it was a little suspicious of him not to ask any questions but he also knew that if didn't know all of the things he did, he'd probably just stay silent in shock anyway. So he just said, "Oh, she seems nice."

Ryan smiled before looking at his watch and sighing, "Well, it's almost 5, I'd better get you home." so Gavin gathered his bag and Ryan helped him down the stair again before they slipped on the helmets and Ryan backed out of the garage.

Again, they watched the sunset sink into the street as they rode to Gavin's home.

As Gavin handed him back his helmet, he asked Ryan if him and Lindsay would like to meet at his place and Dan could drive them all to the party. Ryan agreed and bid him goodbye. Gavin watched him zoom off into the darkening suburban streets.


	13. The Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look me in the eye and tell me that 2016!Teen Gavin wouldn't wear a button up to a party goodbye kind sir.
> 
> Also lmao hey what has it been, like 84 years? Anyway, it's out, I'm happy, I hope you are too, love you guys <3

 Dan hummed along to a song playing out loud on his phone as he slid on his graphic tee. Gavin finished buttoning up his shirt and played around with his hair.

"I still think we should have worn ties." said Dan.

Gavin rolled his eyes, "Dan, I am _not_ wearing a tie to a house party."

"You'd wear it if it wasn't Meg's party." Dan murmured under his breath.

Gavin ignored the comment and instead fell backwards onto his bed. He held his phone above his head as he checked his messages.

 **Jeremy** 5:30 pm  
What time are you getting...

He opened it up.

" _What time are you getting to the party?_ "

Gavin messaged back, " _Probably around 8. You?_ "

In the mean time he checked his other messages.

 **Linds** 6:22 pm  
Ryan and I are on...

" _Ryan and I are on our way ^_^_ "

Gavin just sent her a smiley face.

 **Micool** 6:29 pm  
Dude what the fuck did...

Gavin opened it with interest

" _Dude what the fuck did Mr Pattillo set us for homework?_ "

He rolled his eyes. " _Answering the response questions to that first chapter_ "

Michael texted back almost immediately. " _Oh yeah_ " " _I may have lost my textbook..._ "

Gavin laughed.

 **Jeremy** 6:42  
You're getting there on...

" _You're getting there on time???_ "

Gavin frowned, " _Of course? When else would I get there?_ "

" _At least give it 15 minutes. No one wants to be the first to arrive. Trust me_ "

Gavin closed his phone. He did not want to worry about yet another thing. He'd already tried on 4 different shirts before Dan yelled "Just wear whatever, Gavin! No one even notices what blokes wear to parties anyway!" in frustration.

Gavin looked at him innocently, then back to the small mirror in the joined bathroom. "I just want to make a good first impression is all." he whined.

Dan gave a frustrated sigh and sank on to Gavin's bed, "This isn't even a first impression. She see's you at school all the time." he muttered.

Gavin turned to him, "Why are you getting so mingy about her? Before this you found it funny whenever I talked about her and you egged me on and now that she actually talks to me you talk about her like she's awful." he asked, furrowing his brow at him and squinting.

"Well, I just think that she only likes you because you're on the football team now." said Dan.

Gavin rolled his eyes and turned back to the mirror, "I don't even know if I made the team." he mumbled. He tried on the final shirt and sighed, defeated.

 **Linds** 6:45  
We're here

Gavin jumped up from the bed. "They're here!" he announced to Dan and rushed downstairs. Lindsay and Ryan were still in the black Uber car when he opened the front door. He watched them get out of the car and approach them. Lindsay was wearing a Wonder Woman dress and tights. Ryan followed behind; he wore a simple black and white baseball tee that he'd rolled up to his elbows. Something caught in the back of Gavin's throat and he felt oddly drawn to the veins on Ryan's arms as he ruffled his hair. He blinked a few times and shook his head before Lindsay was hugging him.

"Hi." he greeted, looking more up at Ryan from the hug.

Ryan smiled down at him and said, "Hey."

"Alright well, I did ask Michael if he wanted to come," Lindsay began as she let herself in, Gavin and Ryan followed, "but says he really has to 'study' which is really code for I need to stay in so I can 100% this game." She rolled her eyes, "I'm so happy he puts his games before his friends."

Dan came down the stairs slowly. Gavin noticed him quickly look Ryan up and down and tense his jaw but only before greeting Lindsay with a friendly smile. Gavin shook it off.

"Do you want a tour?" he asked her. Lindsay agreed and Dan ushered her off.

"I thought I was supposed to be the one giving the tour, considering it's my home." Gavin huffed. Ryan chuckled lightly. Gavin turned to him, "I never even gave you a tour did I?" he asked.

Ryan shook his head, "I wasn't really here for long anyway."

"Well, let me show you around." he pointed to the room behind them, "Obviously you know that's the kitchen, and this is the living room." he approached the stairs, Ryan following closely behind. "The very last door down the hallway is Geoff and Griffon's room, they're out right now. The door on the left is the bathroom, it's really Geoff and Griffon's bathroom but guests can use it too." "Speaking of which, the last door on the right is the guest bedroom. And this one here," he nudged his bedroom door open, "is my room." Ryan stepped around him to take a look. On the walls were posters of girls in bikini's and video game figures sat on his bookcase and dresser shelf. Ryan looked as though he was trying really hard not to laugh and Gavin suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable. "What?" he asked cautiously.

"I just- didn't expect _this_ as your room." he said.

Gavin looked down at his feet, "What did you expect?" He looked up for a moment to see Ryan shrug.

"Not this I guess." "It's not bad!" he added quickly, seeing Gavin's flushed cheeks, "Just surprising." "So does Dan sleep in the guest room?" he asked.

"No?" Gavin said as if that was the most ridiculous question in the world, "He sleeps on the mattress beside my bed." he scoffed slightly. 

Lindsay and Dan walked in, Lindsay had goosebumps up her arm. "I was just showing her the pizza oven in the backyard." said Dan.

"We should get together and have pizza or something one night." she suggested. 

Dan grabbed his phone from the bedside table, which was still playing music lightly. "We should probably be heading to the party now." he said.

They each filed out of the room and down the stairs. They were about to exit the front door when Lindsay stopped them all with an abrupt gasp. Gavin almost jumped out of his skin, the sudden outstretch of her arms had scared him.

"We should take a photo before we leave, while we all still look pretty." She pulled out the bulky Polaroid camera from her handbag and held it up.

"Bloody hell Lindsay, what can't you fit in that thing?" Dan chuckled.

Lindsay laughed and took the photo. They stood silently for a few moments before Lindsay snatched the photo and handed it to Gavin, "To add to your collection." she said.

Gavin thanked her and placed the Polaroid on the table next to the front door. They finally exited the house and got into Dan's car, Dan and Lindsay in the front seat and Gavin and Ryan in the back.

"So, what's the deal with Meg and you?" Lindsay asked as they drove, looking at Gavin in the rear view mirror, her eyebrows raised. Gavin's cheeks flushed slightly, he shrugged. She laughed. "I don't know if Ryan's told you by the way, but the list for the football team will be up on Monday."

Gavin felt a nervous swirl bubble in his stomach. He shrunk into his seat and crossed his arms.

"Y'know, you're gonna make the team either way. The list just says whether you made first string or second string."

Gavin perked up a little bit, "Wait seriously?" he asked. Lindsay laughed again, this time with Dan. He looked over at Ryan, even though they were talking about football, he wasn't paying attention in the slightest. He leaned his head against the window and stared at the streetlamps as they passed by. 

"Are you guys hungry?" Dan asked.

"Dude, I could always go for some nuggets from KFC or something." said Lindsay, "But don't you think she'll have food there?"

Gavin was about to open his mouth answer but then Ryan abruptly said, "She won't." and continued to look out the window. Gavin looked to Lindsay, who shifted her body to face the front fully and looked down at her hands in her lap and swallowed. Suddenly the car had an awkward air to it and they were silent for the rest of the trip there, apart from the music Dan turned to which Lindsay lightly sung along.

It was only about 5 minutes till 8 and they could already hear music blaring from a house the guessed was Meg's. Out the front were fairy lights and a keg and even benches that you could sit at. From what they could see, there weren't many cars parked there so Dan parallel parked on the opposite curb.

They had sat there just looking out the window at her house for about a minute when Dan said, "Alright, should we go in?"

Lindsay opened the car door before Gavin hurriedly protested, "Whoa whoa whoa, it's not even 8 yet! We can't go in there before the party's even supposed to bloody start."

Lindsay turned around and raised his eyebrows. She looked to Dan and half-laughed, "Since when were you the party expert?" she said whilst smiling.

"Just something Jeremy told me." Gavin mumbled. Lindsay rolled her eyes, "What?" Gavin questioned.

"Jeremy is hardly a 'party animal' either." she said. She opened her door and got out, and everyone but Ryan followed. He was staring out at Meg's house his brows slightly furrowed. He tapped on the window and Ryan shook his head before looking up at him.

"You coming?" said Gavin through the glass. Ryan nodded and opened the car door. Gavin noticed him take a short but deep breath and then realize with the closing of his eyes. Gavin felt an urge to grab his hand and squeeze but immediately fought the thought. "C'mon." he said encouragingly and began walking across the road to Meg's house, Ryan followed a few steps after.

Lindsay pressed the doorbell. They could only just make out the faint ' _ding dong_ ' through the blaring music. After about 2 minutes of nobody answering, Dan rapped on the door rather harshly.

"Meg, someone's here!" came a light female voice. 

30 seconds later and Gavin's heart was fluttering as Meg opened the door and greeted them with a smile. He frowned and tilted his head, "You-You changed your hair?" he said, pointing to her straightened hair that was now a chocolate brown instead of the purple he was used to seeing.

Meg tucked a strand behind her ear, "Yeah, does it look alright? It only took three hours." she giggled. Gavin nodded.

"It looks awesome." Lindsay commented, "Are we too early?"

"No, not at all, there's a few others here, they were just helping me hide away anything breakable." said Meg as she stepped aside and let the others file in. Gavin turned around just in time to see Meg and Ryan glance at each other and then quickly look away. "Well, there's drinks in the kitchen-or, anywhere really." she said, and Dan immediately filed off down the hallway to find the kitchen.

"You want a drink Rye?" Lindsay asked Ryan who nodded and murmured, "I'll come with you." and followed her down the same hallway.

Ashley came skipping down the large staircase to the right of them and greeted Gavin, "Hey there, you're early."

Gavin's cheeks flushed, "It wasn't really my idea..." he mumbled, although they probably couldn't have heard it over the music.

"Don't worry about it, this way you get first pick at drinks." as Meg said this, she had her hand on Gavin's shoulder and he felt a warmth radiate from the spot. A knock sounded at the door, "Go and have fun, I'll catch up with you later." she smiled at him and removed her hand so she could answer the door.

"Kitchen's down the hall to the left." Ashley guided him with her hand before pacing off into a different room. 

Gavin shoved his hands into his pockets and made his way into the kitchen. Dan and Ryan were nowhere to be seen but Lindsay was leaning on the counter opening a beer bottle. She looked up at Gavin when walked in and asked, "Do you want one?"

Gavin shook his head, "Oh, I wasn't really planning on drinking. I tried it once with Dan and it didn't work out very well. I'm sort of a lightweight."

Lindsay laughed and held out the bottle she'd just opened to him, "That's why you drink more, so you can get used to it."

"Doesn't that make you an alcoholic?" Gavin questioned.

Lindsay just shrugged. "You can have _one_ , you're not driving." 

Gavin took the bottle and pressed it to his lips. The second the liquid hit his tongue he began choking, "That's bloody awful!" Lindsay hit his back with her palm as she laughed.

"Yeah well, you'll get used to it eventually."

Once he'd calmed down he took another sip and asked Lindsay, "Where's Dan and Ryan?"

"Dan's out there," she nodded towards some glass double doors which led to the backyard where a patio and hot tub were. Dan was talking to a group of about 3 sporty looking guys. "As for Ryan," she huffed, "we'll find him later."

Gavin furrowed his brow, "What's up with him? He seems...anxious."

Lindsay sighed. She opened a drink for herself before telling him, "Yeah well, believe it or not our little Ryan used to go to parties like this all the time. I guess he's just a little nervous to come back to one after all this time." There was a short pause while Gavin processed. "And, I mean, it _is Meg's_ party so..."

Gavin wanted to ask what that even meant, but Jeremy had just arrived and Lindsay rushed to greet him. Jeremy and Gavin said a simple "hey." to each other before joining Dan outside. Gavin leaned on the bench where Lindsay had just been and slowly drained the bottle.

He had no idea where the time went but as Gavin went to take another sip from the bottle, he found it empty; and as he came to his senses he realized that there were people all around him and that the music was now much more quiet than the loud chatter surrounding him.

Now Dan was in front of him, handing him a cup of something. "Try this, it's probably the most effective thing I've ever drank." Gavin was reluctant but Dan was holding the cup up to his mouth, so he let the cold drink slip down his throat. It was citrusy, like orange juice, it was good, but it made his head spin. He took the cup anyway and Dan waded off through the crowd once more. Gavin moved to the patio and leaned on his elbows as he emptied the cup in gulps.

Again time passed, and he watched everyone around him like a time lapse as the cup became baron. Someone nudged his side and held out another beer. It was Meg. Gavin took the beer. 

"You enjoying yourself?" asked Meg.

"It'sss alright." his words were slurred and his throat seemed oddly dry considering he'd been drinking for the past god knows how long. He cleared his throat, "I haven't really been to many partiess."

"Well, here's to many more." she held up her bottle and clanked it against Gavin's.

Lindsay's earlier words sprang to mind, and even though when he was in his right of mind his filter would have probably told him this was maybe an invasion of privacy, but his brain wasn't working the best right now, so he asked, "What's with you and Ryan? Did you guys date or sssomethin?"

Meg's expression fell and she clenched her jaw. "Um...Ryan and I-we used to be friends. Really good friends actually." She swished her bottle as she spoke, "Yeah, me and him were best friends up until we were Eleven or something, I dunno, It was a long time ago."

"So, why is he sso awkward around you now?" Gavin pressed.

Meg shrugged, "You have to understand that we were _best_ friends. Sure, Lindsay was there, but me and Ryan would do practically _everything_ together. But then one day he just...stopped talking to me. It was like he fell off the face of the Earth. I was so hurt and upset but, even after all that, when he decided to try and get back to normal or whatever...I invited him to parties like this." she paused again. "He didn't do so well. He was only 14 and he was drinking about 24 beer bottles a week..." Gavin didn't know what to say, so he just stayed quiet. After a few minutes, she continued, "I could never really repair our friendship, but I still felt guilty about introducing him to this life. But during Sophomore year, something changed, he just-hid away again." she shrugged, "He's only just now opening up again. Guess that's got something to do with you." she smiled up at him and Gavin smiled sloppily back.

"Nah, not really." he rejected the comment with a lazy swish of his hand, "He's the one that came to sit with me in the first place."

"Yeah, wonder what it is he see's in you." she said, looking back and forth between his eyes. She shook her head, "Sorry, that sounded really-I didn't mean it like that." she apologized.

Gavin laughed, "ss'alright. I don't really know what any of you see in me."

Meg punched his shoulder playfully, "Don't say things like that. You're really interesting guy, Gavin. I mean, from what I've heard. I don't really know you that well..." she licked her lips, "But I would really like to-I'd like to get to know you better..."

Gavin wasn't paying to much attention, he was mostly just staring at the people dancing in front of him, but as he looked down at Meg, he saw how close she was to him and he just now realized her hand was holding his arm. He stood up and turned to face her.

"Would you let me get to know you?" she asked softly. All Gavin could do was nod, his heart was racing now and his throat felt extremely tight. She raised herself on the front of her feet and moved her face towards his. Gavin's stomach was making a gurgling sound and his chest was either swelling or tightening, he didn't know. Suddenly she was pressing her lips against his gently and the feeling in his stomach made it's way up his chest and in the back of his throat and then a whole lot of hot liquid was filling his mouth and he shut his lips tightly. 

Meg pulled away and frowned, "Are you okay?" she asked.

Gavin swallowed the vomit and managed to get out, "Yeah, sorry, I've gotta go." before he felt it quickly rising again.

He pushed as best he could through the tightening crowd. At some point he ran into Jeremy who furrowed his brows and asked if he was okay as he tapped his back. Gavin felt a lurch of vomit rise up and he had to blow out his cheeks to stop it from coming out. He nodded as best he could and pushed passed him. He finally reached the staircase. Every single step he took it was like the world was spinning. By the time he reached the top he was sweating more than he had at the football tryouts. He quickly fiddled with the first doorknob he spotted and stumbled in. He didn't have much time to look around but judging by the queen sized bed, he assumed it was a bedroom. The door of a connecting bathroom stood slightly ajar. He ran into the room and found the toilet. He crouched down and let everything come up. God, vomiting was the worst feeling to him, but the after effects were magnificent. He sat there huffing for a moment, just appreciating that he'd made it all the way here without spilling a drop. He picked himself up and walked over to the sink where he washed his hands and splashed his face. He looked up into the mirror in front and cringed. His hair was sticking out every which way and his cheeks were very obviously flushed. Then he remembered why his lips still felt tingly and why his heart was beating so hard that he could feel his pulse in his neck.

Meg had kissed him. Meg had kissed him and he had to run away to puke. He punched the sink lightly and cursed himself. He'd ruined everything, his one and probably only chance and he totally blew it. This was rock bottom.

He pushed open the bathroom door with a glum look on his face. He guessed he would just go and find Dan or Lindsay or...anyone that was sober and ask them to drive him home. He sighed deeply and made to exit the room when a voice said, "What're you moping about?"

Gavin turned and saw Ryan sitting in the corner holding a plush pikachu close to his chest and drinking out of a bottle, three empty ones already lying next to him. "Hey?" he said, furrowing his brows, "What're you doing in here?"

Ryan shrugged, "Like I said, I'm not really the party type." He sat up straighter and cleared away the empty bottles, "Now, are you gonna tell me why you're sighing and walking around like a hunchback?"

Gavin began to sigh once again but cut himself off. He walked over to Ryan and slid down the wall next to him. Ryan handed him a full beer bottle from his other side. Gavin screwed up his nose, "No, I'm good." Ryan shrugged. "Meg kissed me." he paused, waiting for Ryan to say something, but Ryan just nodded and swished around the alcohol. He continued, "And I ran away. Because I had to vomit."

"Happens."

Gavin shook his head, "Not to Meg Turney. I've dreamed about kissing her since I was bloody 12 and now I've ruined my one chance"

Ryan just shrugged, " _Maybe_ that's the problem." Gavin looked up at him and frowned. "Well, I just think that you made it out to be this big thing and in reality, Meg's just a girl."

There was silence for a good 5 minutes as Gavin fiddled with his fingers. Now that he'd thought of it, all this time he'd been making Meg out to be a goddess. He felt bad for it, he'd set this unreachable standard for her, not that she didn't meet it, but if she'd ever shown the slightest flaw to him, he probably would have felt cheated, or lied to even. That was such a selfish way to view a person.

"You're right." he said. Something struck him and he furrowed his brow, "Why are _you_ in here anyway?"

Ryan giggled softly and it was so odd to Gavin to hear Ryan acting so childish that he laughed as well.

"I don't even know to be honest. I came up here to find some source of water but-" he took a short break in and held it before blowing it out loudly through his nose, "I saw this," he balled his fist around the soft toy he was clutching, "and I just..." Gavin frowned again, Ryan looked on the verge of tears. He breathed in deep. "I gave this to her on her ninth birthday. I was shit at wrapping it, she knew exactly what it was. She was so happy when I handed it to her." His voice hitched when he said happy.

Gavin felt his heart throb at the sight of Ryan holding back tears. He wasn't sure what to say, so he just caressed his knee. Ryan attempted a chuckle but a single tear rolled down his cheek instead. Gavin grabbed one of the full bottles and popped it open before taking a huge gulp.

Suddenly his problems seemed like nothing compared to what Ryan was going through. Looking at Ryan while at school during middle school, he would have _never_ guessed that he was struggling so bad. To think that a small plushie pikachu could set this big, muscular guy who was popular and handsome and smart and admired by many, was crazy.

Again, the big question scratched his mind. He was about to ask Ryan why he ever sat with him when two people burst in through the door, locked together with their mouths. They fell onto the bed together, and that's when Gavin stood. "I think that's our cue." he said in a low voice to Ryan whom he helped up. They slipped out of the room and back down into the crowd of bodies downstairs. "You about ready to leave?" he asked Ryan.

"Yeah, let's find Lindsay and Dan."

He was about to run off into the swarm but Gavin's arm stopped him. "Trust me," he shouted over the music, "They're both in no condition to drive. I'll just call an Uber. They'll get home okay."

Ryan followed him outside the house where a few clusters of people stood in circles, talking. Gavin requested the ride and they sat on the curb as they waited, not talking. Gavin felt guilty about even inviting Ryan to this party in the first place. He'd already probably hurt him when he made him open his facebook account again, and now this; how many more healing wounds could he cut open?

The car arrived and took them to Gavin's house first. He said goodbye politely to Ryan, even though he was staring blankly out the window again.


	14. The First Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started working on this in October last year. WOW. Almost a year later lmao better late than never am I right? I'm so sorry, things just kept getting deleted and I am SO busy because this is my senior year and ugh wow...here it is anyway. Thanks for being patient <3

It would be the understatement of the century to say that Gavin didn't "feel well" the next morning. His ankle ached from walking on it all night-somehow Michael had convinced him to go crutchless-and his head was pounding. As soon as he'd gotten home, he opened the fridge, dug into the left over pesto pasta, and crashed on the couch. Geoff woke him up with a bottle of water in hand.

"Rise and shine" he said.

Gavin sat up with a prolonged groan. Geoff pressed the bottle to his lips and, like a baby cow, he accepted it with both hands.

"How're you feeling?" He asked, with a mock sympathetic smile. Gavin could only respond with a small whine.

"You ready to go for a drive?" Dan asked as he came down the stairs.

"What?" Gavin questioned, borderline horrified. "We're going _outside_?"

"Left my car at Meg's."

Gavin lay back down; a little too fast apparently because he's vision began to spin. "We're going back to _Meg's_?" he groaned.

Dan tapped his legs as he said, "I thought you'd jump at the chance to see your girlfriend."

Gavin closed his eyes and sighed, "She's not my girlfriend..."

"Well, that's not what I heard." said Geoff with a wink. Gavin shot Dan a look to which he didn't show any signs of acknowledgement. 

"Come _on_. I don't want to go by myself." Dan begged.

Geoff clutched his hand to his chest, "Okay, well you'd be with me Daniel don't insult me." Dan laughed and held out Gavin's crutches to him.

 _They were only getting Dan's car; it wasn't like they had to go inside and actually see Meg,_ Gavin reasoned to himself. With a rather loud crack of his back, he stood up, snatched the crutches, and grumbled over to the door. The Sun beaming onto his face like an over obnoxious douche almost made him change his mind, but Dan pushed him further along.

When they got in the car, Geoff handed him a pair of sunglasses which he gladly put on. "I hardly even saw you at all last night." said Dan.

"Yeah I uh, don't remember much actually. It all kind of blended together." Gavin's brain gave a hard thump when trying to remember what he did during those lost hours.

"Well, my night was pretty damn good. I beat the school's center player at a keg stand," Dan recounted. "The cops came around 12 though and that's when Lindsay, Jeremy and I ordered an Uber."

Geoff looked back at Dan in his rear view vision mirror "You didn't tell me there were cops involved." he scowled.

"Eh, it isn't relevant."

Geoff scoffed, "How is that not relevant Dan? If I can't trust you not to get into huge trouble at parties I won't let you go to them anymore!" 

Dan raised his voice to defend himself, "I didn't get into huge trouble did I? Everything's fine, no one's dead."

"Can we stop yelling?" Gavin pleaded, rubbing his temples gently.

When they finally reached Meg's house, Gavin could see Ashley and another blonde girl picking up rubbish out in the front yard.

"There's my car." Dan pointed out the beige car that Geoff kept spare. Gavin pushed the sunglasses further up his face and got out of the car after Dan. He kept his head down in the hopes that Ashley wouldn't recognize him. But then his stomach fell.

"Hey, Gavin!" it was Meg. Gavin stopped but didn't turn sideways to face Meg. "Aren't you gonna talk to me?" Meg laughed. Gavin finally turned, Meg was standing on her front lawn with a half full bag of trash. He sucked in a short breath and walked up to her.

"Hey, how're you doing?" he asked politely.

She smiled, "Pretty good actually. You however...have looked better." 

Gavin curled his lips, "Thanks for the compliment." he huffed.

There was silence for a few seconds, Gavin looking to his feet for support. He noticed how a corner of his button up was tucked into his jeans and the other was hanging out freely, his jeans were crinkled, and he could only imagine how disheveled his hair looked. He was fine with this until Meg broke the silence.

"So, about last night...I didn't mean to force anything on you I just thou-"

Gavin interrupted her, "No, I wanted it to happen..." he said sheepishly.

"Oh," Gavin looked up at her and she frowned, "so, why'd you run away?"

Gavin buried his head in his hands and groaned, "Because I drank too much and I needed to vomit."

Meg laughed, "Well that's good, because I didn't think I was _that_ bad at kissing." Gavin chuckled with her. "Anyway, I would really love to get to know you better, Gavin. I was wondering if you wanted to get lunch or something..."

Gavin felt his cheeks flush. "Um, yeah. Yeah sure, of course. That would be swell actually." he stammered.

"Awesome, well, I'll message you." she said. Gavin said goodbye and waved to Ashley before making his way across the road to Dan's car.

"So?" Dan asked as Gavin climbed into the passenger seat.

"So what?" 

"Are you guys a thing now?"

Gavin looked at him and furrowed his brow, "What makes you think that conversation had anything to do with that? We could have just been talking about the weather."

"But you weren't" Dan raised his eyebrows, "C'mon, it's common knowledge now that you guys kissed."

Gavin sighed, "News travels fast huh..." he mumbled. Why did _that_ have to be the time when Meg kissed him. When Dan didn't start the car Gavin looked at him expectantly, when no answer came he rolled his eyes, "She...asked me out on a date-I think." Dan pursed his lips in an expression of surprise and approval. "What?" Gavin questioned.

"Just didn't think the day would come." he said teasingly. Gavin hit is shoulder as he started the car.

* * *

On Monday morning Dan dropped him off and squeezed Gavin's shoulder. "Fingers crossed for first string hey?" he said.

"I'll be happy with anything really." said Gavin, wrapping his bag around his shoulder. "I'll see you this afternoon." Gavin got out of the car and waved to Dan as he drove off. Today was the day that the football team was announced. Since Lindsay let it slip that everyone makes the team anyway, his nerves calmed a bit. But still, it would be exciting to see if he made it onto the field or whether he was stuck on the bench. As he approached his locker, Meg walked up to him. 

"Morning, you. So, I was thinking that tonight we could go see a movie or something in celebration of you making the team?" she asked, smiling.

Gavin hadn't expected anything to happen so soon and his words caught in his throat, "Um, uh-ye-yeah-" he stuttered. 

"Swell," she said with a wink, "I'll do some study while you're in detention and meet you at your locker this afternoon. I'll drive."

"Alright," he breathed, "I'll see you then." he managed a small smile before she returned to her friends. His heart was pounding as he took out his chemistry book from his locker. Was he really about to go on a date with _the_ Meg Turney this afternoon? He shook his head, _Remember she's just a girl_. He taped the polaroid Lindsay took of them before the party under the previous one from the pool before closing his locker and making his way to chemistry. 

Ryan was already sitting on a stool at their usual bench, sketching something into his book. He looked up as Gavin entered. "Why are you so cheery?" he asked as Gavin flung his book onto the desk with a smug smirk.

"Oh, no reason. Just excited for today." he answered a little slyly.

"You ready then?" 

Gavin nodded, "Yeah, whatever happens I think I'll be content."

Ryan raised his eyebrows, "Alright, a new found confidence huh? I'm digging it." Gavin laughed. He opened his laptop to email Dan.

Gavino: I don't mean to Alarm you, but you do not have to pick me up this afternoon.

Daniel: Wow ditching me again huh? Who is it this time?

Gavino: Oh just...

Gavino: Miss Meg Turney

Daniel: Well alright, have a blast.

_That's it? Why isn't he as excited as I am?_

Gavino: I'll see you tonight. Save me a coke!

There was no reply so he closed his laptop again.

When the bell rang to signal lunch Ryan joined Gavin on his way to the school pinboard, making a quick stop at Ryan's locker so he could give Gavin his lunch bag. People crowded around the list murmuring and whispering to each other ominously. One boy that Gavin recognized from the tryouts turned around with a wide eyed stare and blurted, "I can't believe I-I made first string." Gavin's stomach dropped, that was one less spot. It wasn't like he desperately wanted to make first string, but it would be a giant confidence booster if he knew that he could. Ryan pushed through the crowd up to the front, Gavin choosing to wait behind. Gavin held his breath as Ryan scanned the list, turned around and made his way back over to him.

Ryan rested his hands on Gavin's shoulders. "What do you want to know first, your position or string?"

Gavin replied "position" quickly.

"Alright, Runningback." Gavin let out a small sigh of relief, he could do that, he was fast. "And..." he sucked in a breath again, "second string" Ryan announced with a shake of his shoulders. Gavin couldn't help but smile wide. Without thinking he curled his arms around Ryan's chest and hugged him. Ryan paused for a moment before giving Gavin's back a rub. He was happy with second string.

"Thank you. So much. You were right about everything, I feel better already." his voice began to hitch as if he was going to cry but he swallowed it.

"Don't mention it. You'll hate me once we start training." Ryan chuckled, and Gavin could feel the vibrations in his chest as he did so. Gavin pulled away and they made their way to the cafeteria where Jeremy, Lindsay, Michael and Trevor were all awaiting eagerly for the news.

Gavin told them all with a squeak in his voice. "I told you it'd all turn out fine!" Lindsay said as she gently kicked Gavin's ankle under the table.

He cheesed as the others said their praises. "You're not mad about second string?" asked Jeremy.

"Oh, definitely not. I think I'd probably vomit if I'd gotten first string. Too much pressure." Gavin replied, half joking but also completely serious.

Break ended and the rest of the day breezed by. In detention, as they picked gum off the bottom of the freshmen's desks, Gavin still couldn't stop smiling. 

"Okay," Ryan addressed it once again, "no one smiles that much from getting on the football team." Gavin just shrugged. "What're you doing this afternoon?"

Gavin cleared his throat, "Well," he calmed his smile a little but he ended up looking more like a stuck up prick than cool about it, "I'm going on a date actually."

Ryan looked away from Gavin and stared at the gum he was currently hacking off with a blank expression, "Oh-with Meg?"

"Yeah." Gavin somewhat sighed happily.

"So, you guys are a thing now?" still, Ryan didn't avert his eyes.

Gavin shrugged, he couldn't help his smug smile. "Spose so."

Ryan swallowed as he dropped his scraper in the soapy bucket of warm water next to him. "Cool." was all he said.

 _Ryan as well now?_ Granted, Ryan didn't know about Gavin's borderline obsession with Meg since he was basically fresh out of the womb of elementary school-but still, him and Dan could put in a little more enthusiasm. 

Detention finished with Ryan letting Gavin know that the first training session is on Wednesday and them both nodding off in separate directions. Just as she'd said, there was Meg, standing by his locker with nothing more than her car keys. Gavin greeted her and put his stuff away. 

"So, what do you wanna go see?" Meg asked as they made their way down the front steps.

Gavin racked his brain, was there a wrong answer to this question? What if he said the wrong movie and she broke up with him immediately? He'd be laughed at immediately. It'll spread around the school that Gavin Free was the idiot that lost his chance with Meg Turney before they even went on their first date because he actually generally enjoyed movies like Sharknado. A single drop of sweat ran down from his forehead as he answered shakily, "Uh-that new romance movie with um-Ryan Gosling."

Meg screwed up her nose, "Hm, I dunno. I'm kind of in the mood for something funny. And not cheesy funny, like rom-coms, actually funny. Let's watch that new action-comedy! I keep seeing ads for it everywhere and it's gotten me quite hyped."

Why did she even ask? Not that he minded her choice at all. Laughing at a comedy will distract them both from how close they are instead of a romantic movie which makes them both acutely aware that they are in fact on a first date and makes them question, _should we be making out like they are?_ Gavin was not ready for that.

"Done deal." he replied.

Meg was a good driver, and she had a nice car, which took away a little of his nerves. Her car smelt like cherry, unlike Dan's car which smelt like burning plastic most of the time. That probably isn't a good sign...

The cinema was quiet, it was a Monday afternoon after all. They bought their tickets-Meg also bought a tub of popcorn bigger than her head-and sat down. Sitting together in the light was fine, as the adverts played, the spoke in hushed tones over them; Meg asked him if he's stoked to start practice on Wednesday and Gavin asked her if cleaning up after the party had taken a long time...but then the lights went low, and Gavin was made aware of how hard his heart was beating. He adjusted and readjusted himself in his seat, nothing was comfortable. When he was feeling brave, he chanced a glance at Meg who was watching the movie intently with a small smile, slowly scooping popcorn into her mouth. He thought about if he should do something? Anything? Shouldn't first dates be a chance to make a move? He found himself drifting in and out of the movie as he planned some sort of way to put his arm around her and put his hand on her leg and also to question whether his constant shifting in his seat was annoying the people behind him. It was getting towards the end of the movie now and, of course, the underlying romance between the protagonist and the sassy, bad ass sidekick was coming to a climax. As they stood, outnumbered, on top of a building, they stared into each others eyes, Gavin could feel sweat poor out of every nook and cranny of his body. The protagonist wrapped their hand around the back of the sidekicks neck and tilted their head up. Gavin would have thought he was having a heart attack if he knew he could feel his left arm. To Gavin, it happened in slow motion, as the protagonist brought the sidekick in for a kiss, simultaneously, in the corner of his eye, he could see Meg turn to him. Gavin went completely cold and went stiff in his seat. Did he want him to kiss her? Is that what's happening here? Just do it then. But his body wouldn't let him. He sat frozen, eyes glued to the movie screen. Curse Hollywood and their need to put unnecessary relationships in every movie. It felt like forever, but the scene finally finished, and Meg instead settled for putting her head on Gavin's shoulder, which Gavin's stomach still flipped out about.

Once the movie had ended, they both got into Meg's car as she made her way to drop Gavin home. They discussed their thoughts about the film; Meg mentioned scenes that Gavin must have blocked out during his panicking, so he just laughed and nodded. Meg was the type of girl to walk you to your door. Gavin was glad Dan didn't open the door or anything because Meg grabbed his hands gently and smiled up at him. "This was fun." she said. Gavin nodded. "Next time, we should do a little more talking I think?" she suggested. Gavin smiled and nodded again, "Definitely." She said 'next time', he didn't totally ruin it. They stood in silence for a few moments, Meg was looking around expectantly for something and Gavin's brow twitched; she-she wanted him to kiss her didn't she? This was the perfect opportunity, they would be leaving each other right afterwards so they wouldn't have to sit around awkwardly if it was awful. But yet again, his body wouldn't let him do it. 

After a few more moments of growing uncomfortable silence, Meg leaned up and kissed his cheek. "Night, Gavin. I'll talk to you later." she said. He bid her goodnight as well and she left him. After a deep sigh of relief, he walked into the house.


End file.
